Treason, betrayal, lies - all these are links in the same chain. They hurt painfully, make a woman doubt herself and, of course, her husband's love. You need to find the strength to cope with the pain and continue living fully.
It is necessary
- - The Diary;
- - a pen;
- - subscription to the gym or pool;
- - intramural consultation of a psychologist.
Calm down and look at the situation from the outside. The fact of treason is obvious, but is it worth dramatizing what happened? After all, no one died, did not get sick. Everything is relative. Now what happened seems to you to be something very serious, scary, sad, but time will pass - a month, a year, five years and you will already remember the betrayal with much less heightened feelings and emotions.
Think about the fact that sometimes cheating is even necessary. For what? So that you understand what kind of person really lives next to you, that he does not value your relationship. The sooner the betrayal happens, the more chances a woman will have to break off relations with the traitor and find a truly worthy person. There is another version of a positive outlook on treason: what happened will reveal the existing problems of your marriage, help you eliminate them in a timely manner and live together further, but without lies and falsehood.
Analyze why the betrayal happened: because of the loving nature of your husband or for some other reason? What has your relationship with your spouse been like recently? Perhaps, having changed, he wanted to prove something to you? Who was the leading partner in your family? Maybe he just got tired of being henpecked and decided to feel like a real man? What was your sexual relationship like - did it have enough passion, novelty, emotion?
Talk frankly with your husband about what happened, try to stay calm. To do this, give up for a while from the role of a deceived wife, become a friend, comrade. Ask why he did it? Ask him to be honest. Say that you are very hurt and upset by the fact that your spouse betrayed you. If you feel your indirect guilt in what happened, tell your husband about it, decide how you will live on.
Don't go over the details of what happened in your mind over and over again. Try to diversify your life, fill it with interesting things and events. Find a hobby you like, sign up for some courses, buy a gym or pool membership. Remember to keep an eye on your appearance. Work to improve your self-esteem.
Keep in mind that the temptation to plunge into depression is great. Everyone around you will feel sorry for you, you will look like an unhappy wife and, perhaps, your betrayed husband will realize the full extent of his guilt, crawl on your knees and beg for forgiveness. However, this stereotype is false: yes, at first they will feel sorry for you, your spouse will be ashamed to look you in the eyes, but every day your depression will drag you deeper and deeper, and people who empathize with you will have their own affairs and problems and will have no time for it. you. And the husband will prefer a stronger, more successful and self-confident woman.
Keep a diary in which you write down all the thoughts and feelings that torment you. Leaving them on paper, fill yourself with new emotions that you need in order to get out of this situation as a winner, namely: confidence in yourself and tomorrow, constructive anger, self-esteem.