In the modern world, the idea of the “withering away of the family” as a social institution is very popular. At the same time, although the modern family differs from the one that existed 100-150 years ago, this social institution is far from disappearing and still retains a priority value in the development of the personality.
The bond between the child and the family is especially strong because it arises at the intersection of biological and social principles. The social can be canceled, what will be the consequences of such a cancellation - another question, but in principle, cancellation is possible. It is impossible to cancel the biological, and it is precisely this that prevails during the neonatal period. In moments of physical contact with the mother, the child smells her, hears the rhythm of her heart, which he heard during intrauterine life - all this creates a feeling of security. Isolation of the child from the family, first of all, from the mother during this period generates a basic distrust of the world, on the basis of which the personality will be formed in the future.
Infancy, early and preschool childhood play a decisive role in the formation of personality. If at this time something is missed in the upbringing and development of the child, it is no longer possible to correct this in the future. And it is these age periods that the child spends in the family. Thus, the influence of the family determines all further development of the personality.
This statement is not canceled even by the fact that many preschoolers attend nurseries and kindergartens. Psychological studies show that the temporary stay of a child in a child care institution isolates him / her from the family physically, but not psychologically: the kindergarten teacher does not push back the parents as a reference person. Violation occurs only with prolonged isolation from parents, when the child is in a boarding-type children's institution, and this becomes a serious psychological trauma.
During infancy, early childhood and preschool childhood, not only basic trust or distrust in the world is formed, but also initial social interaction skills, which can differ from culture to culture, from people to people, and even from family to family. The most significant people for the child - the parents - become the standard for mastering such skills.
The perception of parents as a standard persists in subsequent periods of development, when their influence weakens somewhat - in primary school and even in adolescence. A teenager may rebel against his parents, but he will inevitably follow the norms of behavior and value orientations learned in the family.
As pedagogical practice shows, it is almost impossible to overcome the influence of the family. This becomes especially evident when the family is negatively influenced - for example, when alcoholic parents force a child to steal. In such cases, the only way to save the child is to remove him from the family until the parents change their behavior. On the other hand, positive behavioral and moral standards learned in the family are able to withstand the negative influence of the environment - for example, a girl who grew up in a Christian or Muslim family never recognizes sexual promiscuity as a "norm", even if at the university where she studies, many female students behave this way.
The priority importance of the family in the development of the personality is especially clearly manifested in those cases when the child is deprived of family education. Children growing up in orphanages often lag behind in development and experience difficulties in social adaptation.
