Love is an invaluable gift sent down from above. Sometimes we waste it, exchanging it for petty claims to each other, unpleasant quarrels and endless clarification of relations, which come to naught, losing the last sparks of love … How to preserve this gift, without which no family feels happy, turning into a union of hateful friends friend of people?
Without mutual respect, even the most passionately in love couple eventually comes to disagreements, and the accumulated resentment against each other splashes out in emotional clarifications of the relationship, full of mutual reproaches. Mutual irritation emasculates feelings, reduces mutual physical attraction. Often, such relationships end in mutual aggression, scandals and may sooner or later lead to a break.
Nevertheless, it is possible to build relationships, although not easy. Scenarios for the development of relationships are laid at the very beginning, when people try to please each other - and make mistakes, which later become detonators of violent quarrels. The causes of disharmony are rooted, most often, in ourselves. The sooner we realize these reasons, the less conflicts and crisis situations await us in marriage.
How do you behave in different life situations?
You may be too accommodating and embarrassed to voice your needs. You agree to the conditions and requirements of the partner, although this is both inconvenient and unprofitable for you. Say yes even though you desperately don't want to agree. You are embarrassed to express dissatisfaction, being left alone with your unresolved problems. As a result, your partner gets an expensive mobile phone, while you are ashamed of your old uncomfortable sandals. You have responsibilities that cannot be fulfilled due to lack of time or excessive effort, and the accumulating fatigue prevents you from enjoying a good rest. A cat appears in the house, causing you to have a slight debilitating allergy, and your leisure time is filled with unpleasant people who spoil your mood and cause irritation. Over time, the uncomfortable life is reflected in the relationship. Your rebellion, which breaks out from time to time, is repulsed by a misunderstood partner - or causes severe aggression on his part. The anger accumulating inside manifests itself in bouts of unaccountable anger, you cry, seemingly for no reason, or withdraw into yourself, dooming both your partner and yourself to loneliness together. How to avoid this everyday little hell?
Let go of false shyness and over-delicacy. Learn to say no and justify your refusal. It’s much easier to convince your partner in the beginning, but over time he will get used to respecting your desires and unwillingness. Be clear for yourself: what urgent needs you need to satisfy, and perhaps your partner has the same urgent needs. Learn to separate the main from the secondary. And then you will not sit in torn tights or uncomfortable, worn-out shoes, sadly listening to the sounds of an exotic music box, accidentally bought at a flea market. Only those people whom you are pleased to see will appear in your house, and after friendly feasts you will not have to make a row with your partner, wondering the next morning - what, in fact, began a violent quarrel.
Confidence is the main quality that inspires respect. Gently, but unequivocally, stop any attempts by your partner to "sit on your head." Try not to deny yourself the necessary expenses for the sake of the whim of your beloved "half".
On the other hand, do not forget to say pleasant compliments and warm words to each other. Exciting memories of the first meetings, places dear to the heart, memorable music - a number of surprisingly inspired little things that surrounded you in the era of romantic passion for each other will help to revive unforgettable moments of your life together. Do not be afraid to look sentimental, your loved one will not condemn you for this, but you will remind you of the most important thing that once connected you - the kinship of souls. Do not hesitate to confess warm feelings to each other, this protects love from fading away.
A good, lasting, confident union between a man and a woman arises when each of them takes care of the needs of the other, remembers significant "personal" dates, makes small gifts from a pure heart. And it’s not scary if the situation described in the story of Oh Henry "Gifts of the Magi" occurs in your life: when the young and poor newlyweds decided to give each other gifts, donating the most valuable thing they had: the husband sold his expensive silver watch without a chain, to buy his wife an exquisite one to care for her luxurious brown hair, and the wife cut her hair and sold it to buy her husband a silver chain for his favorite watch. After all, the most important thing in a relationship is harmony and love, not devoid of romance, even if this romance has a smack of light sadness. And at the heart of love is always the desire to give, to give - solitary walks, little joys, pleasant surprises, touching care and respect for each other.
