When children refuse to listen to and comply with the requests of their elders, parents feel uncomfortable. They feel like a tug-of-war competition is brewing. Both the child and the parents pull him towards themselves with the same determination. As a result, each side fails.
Moms and dads are outraged when their offspring show disobedience. But not every time parents realize that neglect of authority is a prerequisite for the formation of a person's self-confidence from childhood.
In order for the kid to sincerely believe in himself and acquire the qualities of an independent person, he needs to realize the main thing. The leaders he previously followed unquestioningly are no longer. And he is in some ways smarter than them.
If he managed to get around mom and dad, who were the most authoritative people for him, he will find the strength to get around anyone! It is this idiom that is written in the subconscious of children. The little revolutionary who rebelled against the annoying family regime is the future leader. He took a good "dose" of confidence in his own competence, and he will never be able to "get off" from it.
Self-confidence is formed in adolescents through the skill of decision-making. Children should understand that life is a consequence of their own choices and the circumstances in which they are made. Choice is empowering, and being able to do it can significantly reduce children's stress levels. It is also more effective than coercion.
Why are teens naughty?
The reason is the parents, who cannot allocate more time for communication with the offspring. A chaotic lifestyle leaves no opportunity for mom and dad to pay attention to the child, to discuss with him. Adults need him to obey this second, as they are too busy solving their own problems.
Children cannot always change very quickly. Sometimes disobedience is a temporary reaction of adolescents to changes in the current situation. This can be a move, a change of school, a divorce of elders, or puberty. We need to give the children time to recover.
How to survive the transitional age of a child without stress?
For parents, this period is not an easy stage. They mistakenly believe that their role as the main protector is radically modified, and they will not be able to fulfill the main purpose. And then moms and dads begin to feel like unwanted characters in children's lives.
Adults note that they are less and less allowed to make important decisions concerning the child. And in their minds it turns into a real tragedy. Parents miss the point: the offspring still need them, but during such a period they should step back and organize a personal space for him so that he can grow up as a mentally balanced, full-fledged and whole person.
