Love is blind. But "butterflies in the stomach" should not control the head. Otherwise, you can become hostage to unhealthy relationships that are destructive to mental, emotional, and sometimes physical well-being. Open your eyes and beware of men whose behavior is clearly signaling problems to come.
He's too jealous
Forget about "jealous means love". The green-eyed snake has no place in a healthy relationship. Yes, at the very beginning, when you first started dating, rare mild bouts of jealousy may still be appropriate. They signal some partner's uncertainty about their own attractiveness, about doubts that you equally assess the seriousness of your intentions. But the desire to take control of your every step, to regulate your social circle, to limit your independence, justified by jealousy, can only be the tip of the iceberg, under which a dangerous pathology is hidden. Such a man may decide that he has rights over you, his jealousy will turn into an obsession and may result in aggression. A “cute jealous man” quietly turns into a tyrant in the home who will cut you off from sources of support, isolate you from family and friends, and deprive you of the opportunity to make your own decisions about leisure, career, and appearance.
He is a "victim of circumstance"
He has a difficult childhood, a despotic or detached mother, a bitchy ex, mean colleagues, a boss who does not notice merit. In the words of the Minister-Administrator from the play by E. Schwartz "An Ordinary Miracle" - "Horses are traitors. People are scammers. " And only you - ideal, kind, generous - can understand, accept and help. Run! This is a person who cannot take responsibility for his life upon himself, and soon you will become guilty that you do not love so much, do not appreciate that, do not support enough. At the same time, all the shortcomings found in you will not force him to disperse with you. What for? After all, he was looking for the "extreme" in the relationship. He is used to blaming others for his mistakes. The loved ones are also responsible for the emotions he experiences. He is angry because you made him angry. Yelling at you because you have driven him. All in sadness at your birthday from the fact that he received little attention. The guilt complex that such people manage to cultivate in their partners can not only ruin their lives, but lead to serious nervous breakdowns.
He is prone to aggression
Violence can take many forms. It does not necessarily translate into physical aggression, but it can also be sexual, emotional, and even verbal. A nice guy, angry, called you an unprintable word, but after a long time he apologized? It's still a bell. When he lost his temper, he hit the wall with his fist? This is already the alarm. Didn't hear you say no? And this is the howl of a siren. By ignoring all of these signs, you run the risk of falling into the most dangerous relationship in your life. Aggression towards others, even verbal, is also a reason to think about whether you need this relationship. “He doesn't behave like that to me” is an unconvincing argument. After all, it would be more correct to say - "he still does not behave like that with me." And it’s only a matter of time when for the first time it will “arrive” to you. And for the first case, the second will not be long in coming, and so on. So is it worth wasting time on the aggressor?
He often criticizes
It is normal for people to criticize others from time to time, but when a man criticizes everything and everyone, and especially when you become the object of his criticism, this is not a good signal. Disrespect for your appearance, your behavior, your opinion humiliates you if it is shown in public. But private criticism is not good either. Even if they tell you that a person is guided only by good intentions, he cares about you. Every time a man makes you feel like you're not good enough for him - beautiful, smart, successful - he hurts you, destroys your self-esteem, manipulates you.
He is a "real macho"
This is the type of man who knows exactly what roles a man and a woman should play in society. His views have long been formed and do not hope that you will be able to somehow influence his opinion. Sooner or later, you will be shown that a woman is the weaker sex. And this statement will mean not that you should not drag bags of food from the store, but that you are not equal to him and do not have the same rights. He, by default, is smarter, and therefore, as Batalov's character from the movie “Moscow Does Not Believe in Tears” said - “Remember, everything and I will always decide myself. On the simple basis that I am a man. He will decide how you dress, who to meet, who to work with, when to give birth and what to think. And it is not a fact that at the same time he will adequately provide for his family. But you will also be “not in terms of status” to speak out on this matter.
