Not all women were lucky enough to find their happiness in family life the first time. It's not just childless marriages that break up. It happens that a woman stays with a child or several children and tries to create a new family with another man. His relationship with them is not always easy and simple.
Jealousy on the part of children
It is doubly difficult for a man who has fallen in love with a woman who already has children. He must improve relations not only with her, but also with her daughters and sons. Jealousy is the main obstacle to this. Moreover, it takes place both on the part of the children and the man himself.
A new person appears in the life of the family. Consciously or subconsciously, almost any child in such a situation begins to be jealous: now he has to share his mother with someone. Often children themselves provoke conflicts with a new man in the family. Teenagers can react especially sharply. Their jealousy is enhanced by the specifics of their age.
Children also sometimes find it difficult to accept that "dad has been replaced." It can be difficult for them to perceive a man not only as a gentleman of their mother, but also as their new father. Subconsciously, such a child may feel guilty before his own father for betrayal. Moreover, such feelings can arise both with good relations with dad, and with bad ones. All this also contributes to some hatred on the part of children for their mother's boyfriend. And such negative feelings easily evoke a response from a man.
Children as rivals
On the other hand, the man himself also does not receive at his complete disposal all 100% of the time and attention of his beloved. He can perceive children as his rivals. And when they themselves provoke conflict, some men begin to hate them.
Conflicts as a normal stage in the development of relationships
Thus, conflicts of one degree or another at the beginning of a relationship between a man and a woman with children are inevitable. This is a normal stage in the development of events. The fate of all family members will depend on how successfully such conflicts are overcome.
First of all, the responsibility for overcoming mutual hatred rests on the shoulders of a man. Children regardless of age (both preschoolers and adolescents) can act on a subconscious level. Whereas a man is quite capable of tracking his feelings, understanding their causes and looking for a way to the hearts of children.
If a man continues to hate children
A man can concentrate too much on his hatred of children. This does not mean that he does not love their mother. But such an attitude of a man indicates that he is not able to accept a woman completely with her whole life, of which children are a part.
Such a man puts his beloved in a very difficult position. He forces her to constantly choose between him and the children. This is a very difficult choice. Relationships in this case can end even if there is mutual love between a man and a woman, if she makes the final choice in favor of children.
The situation becomes especially difficult if a man continues to hate a woman's children, waiting for his child to appear in the family. With the birth of a baby, the situation in the family will become even more tense: a man will fiercely defend the interests of his own child, often to the detriment of other children.
The presence of hatred in the family is permissible, but only for a very short time. If a man continues to treat a woman's children badly without taking measures to overcome negative feelings, then this will not contribute to the psychological comfort of either himself or her or the children. Which, in turn, can destroy love between adults.
