40 years is the age when it is customary to look back and summarize intermediate results. It is human, in principle, to regret missed opportunities, and women in their 40s are no exception. Fortunately, having rethought life lessons in time, it is never too late to start from scratch and work on mistakes.
Neglecting your own interests to please others
The most common reason for regret among 40-year-old women is the realization that they very rarely put their desires, interests, and needs first. On the one hand, this is normal and natural, since a certain element of sacrifice is inherent in the fairer sex by nature. It is the female body that bears the child, gives pleasure to the man, and the traditional duties determine the woman's place at the hearth in providing comfort and coziness for her family. At the same time, modern society has long been talking about healthy egoism and self-love. However, not everyone can break this inner barrier that prescribes putting personal needs in last place.
As a result, looking back, the woman realizes that she never visited Paris, did not learn to dance tango and did not advance in her career further than an ordinary specialist. Of course, there were objective reasons for everything: financial difficulties, small children, helping her husband in self-realization. But as a result, in return, she received only a small part of the invested efforts, and her own projects remained unrealized.
It is very good when such thoughts come at the age of 40. This is a wonderful age when much of what was dreamed of earlier is not too late to be realized. Or, conversely, revise your past plans and choose new goals in order to start achieving them without postponing.
Regrets regarding the birth of children
By the age of 40, female reproductive function begins to gradually fade away, so regrets associated with the birth of children come to the fore. Some people are especially acutely affected by remorse over their abortions. Others are worried that they stopped at one child or did not manage to experience the happiness of motherhood at all. No matter how modern ideas about marriage change, family and children still remain an important indicator of a woman's realization in society.
Of course, in the issue of childbearing in adulthood, there is already little that can be corrected. But a sincere desire to give your maternal love sometimes leads to the decision to take a foster child into the family. On the other hand, with the birth of grandchildren, it becomes possible to help young parents by surrounding the little person with care and attention. Well, the easiest way to release unspent maternal energy is to purchase a pet.
Prioritizing Career Over Family
This is how a person is arranged that it is rare when he is satisfied with the current state of affairs. Housewives are sad about their lack of careers, and those who have spent their best years at work would like to spend more time with their families. Working mothers, of course, feel sorry for the missed moments of growing up. Some women, because of their careers, did not dare to have a second child or deliberately abandoned motherhood.
But a family is not only a husband and children, but also parents, who are getting older every year, and the time spent with them is inexorably decreasing. This situation can only be remedied by maintaining the right balance. It is not at all necessary to quit, it is better to do the reallocation of time. For example, do not take work home or pay less attention to it. Arrange weekends that will be completely devoted to loved ones. Better to let household chores and everyday life wait while you visit your parents or walk with your children. After all, loving and dear people are able to give so much warmth and positive emotions that they will surely be enough for new career achievements.
Desire to be comfortable with others
Wanting to meet other people's ideas, women, and men, often do what is expected of them. They depend on public opinion, look around, and as a result, they experience discomfort and disappointment. If you do not want to repeat this scheme for your child, teach him independence, freedom of expression, but only by your own example. Of course, it will not work to quickly change the stereotypes of behavior that have been fixed for years. Therefore, you need to start with small steps, some little things. For example, learn to say “no” to people if the fulfillment of other people's requests or demands is contrary to personal desires. Over time, having consolidated the skill of calm perception of third-party dissatisfaction, one can go even further beyond the bounds of someone else's opinion.
She paid little attention to her relationship with her husband
By creating a family, a woman and a man hope to become the closest people to each other. But, even staying together, over the years they can begin to live like neighbors. Young mothers often overshadow their life partners when a baby is born. Another factor that sometimes takes an unreasonable amount of attention is work. As a result, a woman does not even notice how a loved one gradually turns into a stranger. But it is with him, with her husband and father of children, that she will have to meet old age, share the joys and sorrows when the house is empty. If your loved one is dear to you, do not put him in the last place on your list of priorities. Support with all your might the connection that led to the formation of your union. Because, having once violated family harmony, it will be unrealistic to restore it without loss.
