There are many negative stereotypes associated with adolescent subcultures. Therefore, parents are afraid that their son or daughter will join such groups. Is it so scary and how should parents of informal teenagers behave?
It is important for a teenager to "be his own" in any group
Firstly, parents should understand that it is important for a teenager to “become his own”, to belong to any peer group - be it a yard football team, a company of classmates, a community on a social network, or one or another subculture. This is a necessary stage in the formation of a personality, and the family, for all its significance and value for a teenager, cannot replace full-fledged communication with peers. The fact that a teenager has his own interests that are not entirely clear to you, his social circle expands - this is also natural, and you just need to learn to put up with it. Therefore, having learned that your child is an informal, you should not be afraid and panic, and even more so scold and prohibit.
Try to learn more about the adolescent subculture
In informal adolescents, the most frightening of them is their dissimilarity - their strange clothes, incomprehensible music, hobbies, worldviews. But contrary to popular stereotypes, most subcultures are completely harmless, and for a teenager they are mostly reduced to external attributes (what clothes to wear, what performers to listen to) as a way to declare themselves. Therefore, try to collect as much information as possible about the subculture to which your child belongs. Moreover, you will find more than enough information on the Internet.
But the main source of information is your child. External attributes, a strange image - this indirectly speaks of a lack of attention. Therefore, the best tactic on your part is to pay more attention to the child. Do not scold his tastes, ask him in detail about the meaning of the icons, about what he likes in the music he listens to, about the biography and the latest album of his favorite musician. If a teenager feels sincere attention from your side, he will gladly devote you to all the subtleties of the subculture. This will help you maintain contact and trust. Bans, on the other hand, will only exacerbate adolescent rebellion against the rules.
The appearance of a teenager
The appearance of an informal teenager is what annoys parents the most. For a while, you still have to put up with it. However, set the rules, let the teenager understand that, in general, you are not against non-standard paraphernalia and hairstyles if he goes for a walk with friends, a disco, or a concert. But he should go to school in more or less appropriate form for this.
Let your teenager get sick with the subculture
And no matter how hard it is for you to put up with the defiant tastes and style of a teenager's clothing, the fascination with the subculture passes quite quickly, along with adolescence. If the teenager is not pressured, he himself, growing up, will "outgrow" the passion for the subculture and come to the understanding that "all this is completely unnecessary." There are other more effective ways of self-affirmation - precisely those traditional values against which he so actively rebelled - higher education, career building, creating his own family. In the meantime, parents just need to be patient and learn to accept and love their child as he is "here and now" - with all his oddities and problems.
