Children are the greatest joy. Many couples see their future with two or even three children. But what should be the optimal age difference between them? Should you rely on chance or think it over? What's the best thing for the kids themselves?
A big difference in age from four years and more is considered. What are the benefits?
First of all, the mother will not need to cope with the pregnancy and the small child at the same time. The mother's body will be fully restored, the woman will rest and recuperate.
In addition, an older child can already be independent, if not completely, then partially. He will even be able to help with caring for the baby, just do not make a nanny-nurse out of the firstborn. This should bring joy to the older child, he should feel that he is acting on his own, only out of love for his younger brother or sister.
But there is a big age difference and disadvantages. First of all, children with such a difference rarely become close friends, because they have different interests. And if the difference is 14-16 years old, then the first-born cannot perceive the second child as equal. The needs of children are completely different, one will need to change diapers, while the other will ask for help in solving trigonometry problems. It will be difficult for mom to switch from one task to another.
It is possible that the first-born, who until now realized himself as the only child in the family, will not be happy with the replenishment at all and for him the youngest will become a rival for the love and attention of his parents. Jealousy will be almost inevitable. But there are children who dream of a brother or sister, so the number of conflicts will be minimized.
A small difference in age is considered to be a difference of up to three years. The advantages are that children are similar, they have more common interests, they like each other's company. The lives of children who were born with small age differences are easier to organize from a technical and practical point of view. They can go to the same kindergarten, then to the same school, section, circle, they will go to bed at the same time and listen to the same fairy tales.
But there are also negative sides, for example, it is difficult to raise two small children, it requires a lot of strength and energy. After all, even one small child can greatly complicate life. In addition, the decree will drag on and it will be very difficult to get back on track after such a long break in work.
Psychologists advise to wait at least three years between the birth of the first child and the second. In this case, each child will receive his share of the necessary attention and care, and the parents will not be very tired. Gynecologists also agree with psychologists, because the female body needs rest. And mothers who have such experience say that the difference is always individual, because it is very important to find the middle ground, think over everything, take into account all the factors that affect the family, its budget, psychology, and physical capabilities. It is worth thinking about the second child when everything is already settled and goes back on track.
