The mother carries the baby for nine months under her heart, and then all her life ─ in her heart. When the baby is born, the mother ceases to belong completely to herself and lives his life. How long the mother will continue to live only this life, she decides for herself. A lot depends on this decision.
When a child is born, the mother's existence is tied to meeting the needs of the child. Over time, she is so drawn into this role that she ceases to consider herself or his independent creatures. This happens subconsciously.
When the child grows up
Children are children as long as their parents are alive. After all, no matter how old a person is, parents will love him and worry about him. But sometimes such love is harmful.
The child was born, postpartum depression has passed, and now a lovely young mother is completely and completely devoted to the baby. And this is her main mistake.
Living only for a child, a woman does not notice that her beloved and adored child needs more and more independence. The child grows up, often not noticeable to the mother, turning into an adult and completely independent person.
And here conflicts often begin. Already an adult begins to live not the way his parent wants. Such mothers find it extremely difficult to endure the fact that their children are creating their own family. They cannot accept the fact that children do their own thing.
Children grow up and do not need mothers the way they did in childhood. But the mother, whose child was her life, remains in a kind of vacuum, takes offense at adult children. It seems to her that they no longer need her.
In fact, this is not the case. Needed, but not as much as before. And that's okay. Indian wisdom says that a child in our house is a guest who should be fed, watered, clothed and then released. The latter should not be forgotten. Our children never belong to us.
How not to get what you deserve
Very often, overprotectively taking care of her beloved child, the mother bitterly regrets that the child has grown, but behaves like a little one. He is not at all independent, there is no sense from him. And already an old and almost helpless mother has to raise and take care of a forty or even fifty-year-old "child", complaining that he never got a good idea.
But, they are exclusively to blame. Who has not given the child the opportunity to learn from their mistakes, make choices and be responsible for their consequences? Of course, a diligently protective mother. As a rule, such children are not ungrateful, they simply live by a model of behavior imposed on them.
Whether the mother lives the life of adult children or not is up to the mother herself. If she feels and knows that her children need it, she cannot do otherwise. Parental duty is to get your child back on his feet. And it doesn't matter how old he was.
