The ability to forgive is one of the important rules for building a love relationship. However, learning to let go of resentment is not easy. Moreover, close people know how to hurt a hundred times more painful than strangers. And, often, not everything can be forgiven. This applies equally to men and women. What taboos on forgiveness do the strong half of humanity have?
Criticism in front of witnesses
Women are impulsive and prone to rash acts. Alas, some of them can lead to the collapse of love or even family relationships. A striking example is public criticism made against her man.
It would seem that expressing dissatisfaction and pointing out mistakes is inherent in the very nature of femininity. Psychologists say that the fairer sex does not know how to accept their chosen ones as they are. Women strive to correct, modify, pull a man up to their expectations and ideas about the ideal. In this difficult matter, criticism comes to their aid. However, acting from "good intentions", in response they may well receive negative, resentment and even the threat of parting. Criticism, in principle, does not bother anyone. And if it is presented in the most primitive way, then the result will be forever spoiled relations.
Public criticism is the worst thing you can think of. It is very easy to spoil the opinion of others with such attacks towards a man. Even if later you change your mind and take your words back, negativity will firmly sit in the minds of other people. A man's reputation and public opinion about his abilities can be seriously affected. If a life partner publicly says that he is pitiful and worthless, will colleagues, friends, relatives, and bosses begin to respect and appreciate such a person? Criticism is permissible only in private, and it should be submitted in the correct form with the justification of your vision of the situation, an assessment of the act, and not the personal qualities of the chosen one, and obligatory praise before expressing dissatisfaction.
As for behavior in public, here it is better for a woman to remain silent or to provide her man with minimal support, even if he is at least a thousand times wrong. It is better to postpone the analysis of "flights" until home. Otherwise, neither remorse, nor apologies and vows will help, because by forgiving a woman public humiliation, a man will lose his last chance for rehabilitation in the eyes of others.
Ignoring his sexual needs
When a woman over and over again begins to refuse sex to a man, she puts her relationship with him at risk. The arguments from the category “headache”, “tired”, “no mood” sound convincing only for the partner herself, while her partner remains in complete bewilderment why nothing had hurt before and had enough strength for everything. He begins to view his relationship with this woman as a dishonest deal. She uses everything she wants next to him - money, help, status, and the man himself does not receive what he needs in return. His analytical mind quickly recognizes the complete lack of benefit in this union. And constant refusals hurt men's pride, so the natural desire will be to get rid of unnecessary discomfort.
If the relationship is expensive, and you still don't want sex, you will have to work on yourself and look for reasons why the attraction has disappeared. A visit to a doctor, a conversation with a psychologist, a frank conversation with your partner will help solve the problem without waiting for male betrayal and subsequent loneliness.
Unexpected changes in a woman
Choosing a mate for himself, a man subconsciously wants to always see the woman next to him who initially attracted his attention. Any drastic changes and transformations that occur with her, he will accept, at least painfully.
Suppose, in his view, the ideal wife should not work and in the evenings is obliged to meet her husband with a delicious dinner. And his life partner, after sitting at home for a while, suddenly switches to a career and disappears in the office all day, forgetting about the family hearth and comfort. It is unlikely that a man will accept this "new version" of his woman.
The same disappointment befalls the stronger sex when, having married a beauty queen, after a while they get an unkempt housewife with extra pounds. The faster and stronger the woman changes, the faster the man's desire to stay with her fades away.
Treason
It would seem that while holding the palm in terms of treason, men should not be so principled in this matter. However, you shouldn't hope for forgiveness or forgiveness. Cheating a woman in a man's perception is a blow to self-esteem, betrayal, loss of trust, disappointment. After so many losses, it is rare that feelings and relationships will survive.
Even if a woman succeeds in achieving forgiveness, presenting the betrayal as an accidental mistake, a momentary weakness, the man will still not be able to perceive her as before. The destructive mark of adultery will inevitably remain on both partners.
The requirement to stop communicating with the mother
Most people learn to accept and love their parents for who they are. They expect the same from their halves, or at least politeness, respect, observance of the norms of decency. The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law may be in a state of cold war for years, but incitement to open conflict risks turning into a collapse of the love union. Even if his mother is not right on all counts, it is unreasonably cruel to put a man in front of a choice and demand from him a complete cessation of communication. This decision, if it is really necessary, must be made by your companion. Otherwise, in his eyes, you will forever remain guilty of a quarrel with the closest person.
In order not to make fatal mistakes that cause irreparable damage to the relationship, it is useful in any situation to put yourself in the shoes of your partner. Would you like what you want to say or do? How would your spouse react to this behavior? If rejection and resentment come to mind as answers, then it is better to think carefully about your actions again.
