In family life, it often happens that mutual attraction begins to fade. Mutual sincere interest is replaced by one-sided curiosity, which often causes even greater cooling and alienation. Why is this happening?
Excessive curiosity, according to men, is one of the most repulsive traits in a woman's character. If in the "candy-bouquet" period a man is flattered by a woman's inquiries about the details of his life and work, then in family life such a heightened interest can irritate him and even look offensive in his eyes.
If a woman turns into a home "Sherlock Holmes", the man may lose love for her, and family life runs the risk of turning into an unpleasant game of "detective and runaway". In such cases, a man hides his "secrets" so deeply that a chill can occur in the relationship. Especially if every “find” is followed by a tedious trial and the threat of a family scandal.
The most insidious way on the quality of family love relationships is the "occupation of personal space." If a woman, due to natural reasons, is able to somehow put up with such a manifestation of control, then a man cannot stand it for a long time. He either “breaks down”, turning into a real rag with an “accountable” character, or starts a “game of hide and seek”. Both of these are bad for the attraction to the spouse. In the first case, the "contact" is exhausted by the "report", followed by relief and loss of interest in full-fledged communication. In the second, the excitement sometimes so overwhelms the psyche of a man that it can end with a connection on the side where he is not controlled, but is accepted without conditions and unpleasant consequences.
You should not look "through a magnifying glass" everything related to your husband: work colleagues, friends, relatives. Men react especially sharply to various ironic comments about people, occupations, and actions. Comments on this matter are perceived with caution, and sometimes painful.
If a wife begins to criticize her husband's relatives, friends, his passion for a computer game or other hobby, to interfere in work or creative processes, with the intention of assessing everything and expressing a negative or mocking opinion, the man instinctively defends himself or withdraws himself. Trust in the wife, in her words, estimates, in such cases decreases, instead, the feeling of irritation and danger increases.
To hurt male pride intentionally and regularly means deliberately destroying the love affair. If the wife criticizes and "clever" about and without reason, the man will stop sharing with her information that he considers important for himself. The range of common themes for both can be reduced to household life and the weather. Destructive boredom will reign in communication, relations will become strained. Intimacy will weaken - and with it, physical attraction will weaken.
If the "criticism" goes beyond the boundaries of a man's patience, it may end in open conflict, revenge, when discontent is thrown out on your girlfriends, friends, relatives, work, hobbies. Most often, all this is accompanied by persistent hostility and even hostility to the slightest manifestation of the wife's attention to everything that is in the sphere of his personal interests and connections.
Closeness on the part of a man usually only fuels women's curiosity. The hardest part of a relationship is surveillance. It is dangerous to poke your nose into his records, computer mail, notebooks and mobile phones. First, you may stumble upon information that you are not able to understand correctly. A little nerves and a violent female imagination - and incomprehensible information can be distorted and turn into a reason for unfounded suspicions. Such "discoveries" are not easy to hide. Sooner or later, a woman “speaks out”, thereby insulting her husband. Especially if the spouse is not to blame for anything so “terrible”. For a man, the very fact of being "caught" seems offensive. All this leads to inevitable conflict and repels from the wife.
The worst that can happen in such a situation is if a woman starts to act, actively interfering in her husband's life, in his relationships with people and colleagues. How many marriages broke up as a result of the fact that irrepressible wives called unfamiliar numbers, asked friends or employees behind the back of a secretive spouse …
To make your husband feel confident, leave him the right to decide what he will tell and what he will keep silent about. If you want to "extract" information from him by any fate, be prepared in advance for the spouse to treat your methods adequately: to resist and hide, or even lie.
Husbands living in an atmosphere of psychological abuse suffer as much and sometimes more than their overly curious wives. Such problems do not often lead to divorce. But happiness and attraction goes out of a relationship along with trust. So decide what is more important: the atmosphere of love in the family - or your satisfied curiosity, which, most likely, will soon "get hungry" again and continue its destructive work.
