It doesn't matter how old your child is now. At any age, the baby needs to be mentally prepared for the appearance of a brother or sister. And this must be taken with full responsibility.
How to prepare your child for a brother or sister
Don't hide your pregnancy from your baby. He is a full member of the family and has the right to know about the imminent replenishment. Tell your child that mommy has a little baby in her tummy that will become a brother or sister to him. Say: "Once upon a time you were in my tummy, but now you have become so big."
Try now to set the child up for the fact that this little man will become the dearest to him, that he will play with him, walk with him. Take out baby pictures of your firstborn, show him how small he was. Viewing the family album is necessary so that the child does not have the idea that his sister (or brother) will be born and immediately run to play with him in the park. The child must understand that first a small squeaking lump will appear, which needs to be taken care of, which needs to be loved.
Tell the older child how you taught him to sit, walk, and eat on his own. Explain that when the baby is born, you will teach him all the same things together. When talking, be sure to say something like the following: “After all, you will be the elder. You can do so much already. And come on, when your sister grows up, we will teach her to fold the pyramid, you already know how to do this? Will you help me? Let the child feel important and responsible.
Try to convince the baby of the most important thing even before giving birth - the mother will love everyone equally. In no case should a baby have the feeling that with the birth of a little one, you will stop loving him, or will love less. Talk about it now. After the birth of your youngest child, you will have much more trouble than now. And childish jealousy will still be, deal with this issue in advance.
Let the older child touch your belly while the little one pushes. It will be very interesting for him. Answer all the questions - “Why is he pushing? Did I push too? Will he push for a long time? other.
How to behave after the birth of your second child
If you do all of the above, then praise yourself after giving birth. Because time will be sorely lacking. But in any case, under any circumstances, even if you fall off your feet and dream only of a pillow, do not deprive the older child of your attention! No matter how tired you are, play with your child, read a fairy tale, just talk to your baby. He misses you very much now. After all, almost all of your time is spent taking care of the little one.
Try to communicate more with the older child now. It is important that in the first days after childbirth, your baby does not withdraw into himself, and does not begin to be jealous of you for the little one. After all, now his beloved mother will take care of another little man. Communicate with your child to understand how he or she feels about the smallest member of the family.
Praise your elder as often as possible. Make it clear that you love him. Love just like you used to. That he is still dear to you. Do not punish the child, explain to him that it is forbidden to make noise, for example, when the little one is sleeping. Otherwise he will wake up and cry.
“You're an adult. Let's not offend the kid."
Try asking an older child for help. For example, bathing a little one. Let him just be there, serve up shampoo, soap. Let him understand that he must take care of the little man, because he is the eldest. But in no case do not leave children alone, even for a minute! In such situations, latent childish aggression, if any, is very often manifested. When, at first glance, an older child treats the baby with warmth and care, but in fact is jealous and angry that the mother now devotes less time to him.
Do not force the older child (even if he is already quite independent for this) to sit with the baby when he does not want to. For example, a child is about to go to play in the yard, and you put him to look after the little one. In this case, anger often appears.
- “Vanka (Katka, Lenka, Petka) has no brother - he walks quietly for himself. And sit for me now! And I don't need anyone at all."
Do not lead to such a situation. Let the elder look after the younger when he wants it. After all, he is still a child himself!
Clarify the situation with children's toys. There is no need to ask the older child to immediately give the younger all the toys, explaining that they are now common. Let everyone have their own toys and some things in common. So that there are no problems - “This is mine! No, it's mine! At the same time, then teach the children to share toys with each other, and this also needs to be taught.
Childhood jealousy is unlikely to be avoided. But you can prepare for it thoroughly in advance. And give answers to the child's not yet asked questions. The main thing is attention. Equal attention. Set aside a couple of hours a day when you only work with the older child. He needs you now. Your care and affection will be better for him than any words. Let your family have only love and harmony!
