Sometimes there comes a point in a relationship when things are bad. In such periods, nothing pleases, every event, every act causes only irritation and disgust. And you can endure all this or open up, say that it's time to change something.
All unions develop, and everyone has a time of suspension. This is natural, because after take-off there is always a fall. You need to understand that this is not the end, it is just a lull. But at the same time, it is necessary to make it comfortable for both, because patience may not be enough, and then it will be difficult to return everything back.
What does not suit you
Man is a very emotional creature. He can get angry, scream, collecting different things in a pile. In a moment of anger, it is impossible to control words and actions. Therefore, it is worthwhile to calm down. It is better to talk about negativity in a calm state. But first you need to decide what really does not suit you. Usually there are 1-2 problems, and everything else follows from them. For example, a life partner is out of work, he is not trying to find something, but simply sits at home. At the same time, she does not help with the housework, spends money and does not work with children. In this case, there is only one problem - lack of earnings, and everything else follows from it. Once the main problem is solved, all the others will cease to exist.
Highlight the main problem in your relationship. If it does not work, then make a list of all the claims, and then for each item ask the question: "Why is this happening?" And then you get the root of the trouble. It is about him that you need to talk in a pair, and also about feelings that have begun to fade away. Be honest with yourself, because there is no more that enthusiasm that was in the beginning, there is no more love and passion. But it can only be returned together.
How to tell the truth
Choose the right moment, it needs to be a day when both are not too tired, when children are not distracted and there are several hours to discuss everything. Do not talk in advance about a serious conversation, do not frighten the companion. Just when you find the time, pour some tea and start the story.
Remember that it is better to immediately give the main reasons, explain your claims. But without emotion or screaming. Make it clear what is wrong in a structured way. But do not offer your own solutions. Designate tasks, but talk only about yourself: about your feelings about this, about your feelings and doubts. Emphasize what you think, do not impose an opinion. Then ask what is on your partner's mind. Of course, he can evade the answer. This happens often, because he needs to think. Give the person this opportunity.
Return to the conversation after a while. Maybe in a couple of days or a week. Ask him what he thinks about your words. If he refuses again, look for a new reason. And only after answering, suggest looking for solutions. If the person does not make contact, then write him a letter. Again, state everything you think briefly and clearly, and ask a question about what to do next.
Only families in which problems are discussed can exist for a long time. Learn to build a dialogue, talk about your problems, about your feelings. Be honest, and then you can endure any difficulties.
