Scientists have shown that boys who are in a good relationship with their mothers grow up more emotionally balanced, they are less prone to aggression, they are more likely to achieve success in life. There are simple rules for mothers that can help strengthen the connection with their sons, develop their character, help to ensure that confident young men grow out of boys, creating a harmonious world around them.
Learn to listen to teach you how to speak
Listening is important for everyone, but it is especially important for mothers of boys. Boys are usually slower to formulate their thoughts than girls. When the child pauses, do not finish the thought for him, do not prompt him or start expressing his opinion or answering an unasked question. Give him time, show interest, clarify something in his thought or story. The ability to clearly and clearly formulate your thoughts is very important for a future man and you can teach him this only if you carefully happen to the boy.
Be emotional
People need emotional closeness - men and women, boys and girls. Nobody will turn into a "mama's son" if you hug him more often. The environment teaches boys to be restrained and stern, and who, besides his mother, will teach him to be gentle? Shouldn't a real man know how to be affectionate with his wife, children, loved ones?
And one more aspect of emotionality. If the son sees that the mother can be different - to be upset and happy, laugh and cry, grieve and rejoice, the emotions that other women in the life of a young man will express will not take him by surprise. He will be able to understand them and adequately respond to them.
Remember they are not your copy
Already from an early age, boys develop a special, masculine view of the world. Accept it. Do not expect their reactions to be similar to yours, that your opinion should be the same. Don't show them that you are disappointed with this mismatch. Don't force yourself to adapt. Learn to encourage them to manifest a masculine worldview.
Teach him to cope with "male" affairs
Despite the fact that there is more and more talk about gender equality in society, it will be a long time before men are no longer expected to be able to cope with everyday “male” affairs. Teach him how to handle minor home repairs, how to handle tools, get along with technology. Do not emphasize that this is a "man's business", just explain how humanly unpleasant it is to find yourself in a simple everyday situation that you cannot control.
Teach him not to divide work into "male" and "female"
It doesn't matter what the society is ready for, what matters is what your son is ready for. The modern man is not guided by mossy gender prejudices. He will be able to cook simple dishes, and sometimes he is seriously fond of cooking, knows how to keep the house clean, does not expect someone to take care of the cleanliness of his clothes, can sit with a child.
Involve him in the circle of household responsibilities not as a “mommy's helper”, but as a responsible person who lives in the house and contributes to its life. Even if he becomes a busy director of a huge corporation, he should know that fairies do not wash shirts, and dinner does not appear on the table by itself. A real man knows how much time and work an ordinary housework takes and appreciates the time and work invested in it.
Teach him not to be indifferent
Tell your child that it is his duty, not only as a man, but simply as a person, to intervene if someone is in a difficult situation. You need to be attentive to people in order to see a young mother in need of help with a stroller, or an elderly person who cannot cope with the stairs. But besides that, you need to be able to defend the weak, to intervene if someone is attacked or bullied.
It is important to show him that not everything can and should be decided by force. Teach him to cope with conflict situations with words, to be above provocations. Explain that the one who can prevent it really wins the fight. It is very important to convey to the boy how to assess the balance of power and that there is nothing wrong with retreating to attract help. A man is the one who knows how to solve situations, and not the one who without hesitation gets involved in fights.
Learn to let them go
Someday your son will start an independent life. Learn to let him go in advance, trust him, remember that he is going to become someone's husband, father, friend, and not just remain “your boy” all his life. Let him walk his path, supported by the confidence of your love and the knowledge that you believe in him. Believe that he is a reasonable young man.
And remember that even if he grew up, acquired a life partner, his own children, you will still remain his mother. If you did everything right, he will come back to you to see how proud you are of him.
