Setting up your own home is often the responsibility of both the husband and wife. But it is difficult to involve a husband in housework for some reason that you need to learn to cope with.
Why does the question arise about a man's unwillingness to do housework?
“It’s convenient for me anyway” - this is one of the main reasons why a man can do nothing to improve the convenience of living in an apartment. If his leisure time comes down to dinner and spending the rest of the evening in front of the TV, getting him to make a shoe rack will be very difficult. He has everything to ensure his leisure.
The second reason may be his tiredness after a hard day. In this case, the man can be understood, but at the same time it is worth realizing that this can be an elementary "excuse".
Well, the predominant reason for all the emerging and growing questions is elementary laziness. A man simply does not want to do anything, he will argue for a long time about the fact that a huge amount of manipulation is necessary to fix the outlet. In order to make a shoe rack, you need to have a bunch of tools that neither he nor his neighbor has. But at the same time, work will not advance one iota.
How to deal with this and is it worth fighting at all?
According to the results of the experiment of American psychologists, whose family psychology is more developed, shocking data were revealed. Men who do purely female work around the house live less than other men. Russian scientists have slightly expanded the scope of the experiment and linked the results to the professions of men. As a result, it was found that surgeons and people who had jobs associated with high risks and responsibilities, died after two to three years after retirement.
These two questions are related, and the fault is the change in the pace of life. If the husband at work is constantly busy "saving the world", and at home the wife asks to finally repair the shelf for her cosmetics, this request often leads to refusal. The man responds with a refusal on a subconscious level, he is sure that he is a “breadwinner” and a “rescuer” and he should not do such trifles at all.
All the persuasion of the wife will only lead to irritation and quarrel and further aggravate the situation. The main advice that can be given to girls in this case: listen to your man. It is in the ability to listen and understand it that lies the basis of family happiness, not only in the matter of housework. If you ask a man a question about the well-being in the home or put a task in front of him, look at his reaction in response to this question. If it is causing resentment, it is best not to bring it up again.
It is also worth examining the case when the task is not perceived with hostility, but it is not done either. Reschedule her consideration for a quieter time when your husband has a day off. In a conversation, you can identify the reason why there is a reluctance to do something around the house. You can connect a listing of all the pluses, the work done, and manipulation elements, such as "you are a man", "you can do this better." Alternatively, you can try to take advantage of the flattery and praise.
Among other things, there are responsibilities that the husband does not want to do and those requests to which he reacts very negatively. If you can do a similar task yourself, it is better to do it yourself. You will save your nerves and his. For example, asking to hang up the laundry can cause a storm of indignation on the part of a man. The reasons for this may be different, but if the husband does not say why he does not want to do this, do not pry. But household chores that are not performed by a man, but are beyond your power, enter into a separate list. In the future, voice them to your husband and tell them that you will call a special service worker to solve them. After that, the husband can complete some of the points from this list, since he will spare money from your family budget, and the rest will be performed by a qualified specialist, who must be called only after agreement with the husband.
Remember that maintaining a normal relationship between a man and a woman depends on both of you and should not be limited to a constant division of powers and tasks.
