Each parent thinks about the admissibility and necessity of punishing the child. Someone is sure that the child should be punished only in extreme cases, and does not even think about punishing him physically. And someone is sure that punishment, moreover physical, is the only correct measure in the methods of raising children. But who is right?
What should a child be punished for?
It is necessary to punish your children only in two cases: when the child breaks the rules, about the existence of which he knows. For example, he was taught not to smoke or swear, but he still does it from time to time. Well, a child is punished when, at a young age, he does unconscious acts that threaten him or his safety. For example, if a child actively climbs into an outlet or when he is running in dangerous places.
But is it worth punishing a child if he breaks rules unknown to him or does something unintentional for himself? For example, if a teenager accidentally breaks a grandmother's vase, should he be punished? Well, the answer here only depends on the circumstances. If, for example, he played with a ball and broke a vase, then it's worth it, and if he broke it while cleaning, then the punishment for this is not a very good measure.
How to punish correctly
- In the process of punishing a child, it is necessary to remember that you need to control your emotions. Any emotional reactions should not be allowed, even if the child brings nothing but irritation. This is the most important rule for correct and effective punishment.
- The child should be constantly explained what kind of behavior is considered extremely unacceptable and deserving appropriate punishment. This is necessary so that the child is aware and assimilated the norms of social life.
- Always ask your child in advance about how you will punish him in the event of disobedience or misconduct. For example, you can tell him that even for the smallest offenses, he can be torn off the TV or computer.
- Always explain to your child exactly what you will punish him for.
- Do not pursue the goal of suppressing the will of your child, because in the process of punishment, he should feel guilty and, if possible, apologize. It usually takes a child several hours to apologize.
- Seek obedience, but don't do it immediately. Explain to him the extreme unacceptability of the behavior and accept, say, the most standard punishment - take away the prefix. In addition, you should not put pressure on your child, it is better to wait until he realizes everything on his own and asks for forgiveness.
- Physical punishment should only be used as a last resort. The ideal would be to use physical punishment for only 4 years. Physical punishment should be symbolic, conditional. For example, lightly slap and raise your voice. That should be enough.
