Often in conversations you can hear the word "henpecked" as a dismissive assessment of a particular man. Moreover, often even those who use this concept do not always fully understand its meaning. This is especially true for people who are not inclined to understand the situation, but who like to make judgments on any occasion.
The etymology of the word "henpecked", it would seem, is obvious: "the one who is under the thumb." Since heels are most often worn by women, and the term "henpecked" is used exclusively in the masculine gender, it can be concluded that this term describes the humiliated and subordinate position of a man in a relationship with a woman. In fact, earlier this was the name of hunting falcons, who were put on hoods (special caps) to calm them down. However, over time, the concept has completely passed into the sphere of family relations.
Henpecked explicit and hidden
Throughout the history of Russia and Europe, views on family life have been purely patriarchal. The man was considered the head of the family, solely responsible for making decisions and the main earner. The ideas of women's equality were born relatively recently, so many people are still unable to accept the fact that a woman can also make decisions and be responsible for them. Based on this, such people call henpecked not only those men who completely obeyed their companions, but also simply those who build relationships on the basis of equal rights and responsibilities.
In the classical sense, a henpecked person is a weak-willed male who, for one reason or another, is not able to defend his point of view, which means that he is forced to agree with his girlfriend or wife in everything. People who have not reached any significant heights in life often become henpecked people. Unluckiness in everyday matters becomes an additional argument that allows the companion of such a man to disdain both himself and his point of view on this or that significant issue.
In addition to the obvious domination of a woman over a man, arising from a more aggressive or simply active life position of the fair sex, there are situations in which a man, formally considered the head of the family, is in fact a victim of skillful manipulation. With the help of tears, flattery, threats or cunning, a woman makes her companion do as she wants. In some cases, a man is fully confident that he makes decisions on his own, although in fact he is entirely dependent on the opinion of his “half”.
Weakness or concessions?
Finally, there are "voluntary" henpecked people, that is, people who, in exchange for family well-being and home comfort, give up part of their views, for example, on everyday issues. The difference between this type of men and real henpecked men is that they clearly separate spheres of influence, not allowing women to "their" territory, in exchange for insignificant, from their point of view, concessions. As a rule, such a refusal not only allows the woman to feel like a full member of the family, but also relieves many unpleasant situations and conflicts.
Do not confuse a man capable of compromises and concessions with a weak-willed and sluggish henpecked man. After all, the ability to accept someone else's point of view or admit your own wrong is evidence of maturity and masculinity, not weakness.
