If your husband has children from a previous marriage, it is very important to build the right relationship with them. Jealousy, dislike, or ostentatious indifference towards them will only upset your spouse and worsen your family relationship.
Instructions
Step 1
If you fall in love with a man with all his merits and demerits, accept his past as well. You can divorce your wife, but children are never former. Show maximum tact and patience, try to establish contact with your spouse's children, he will definitely appreciate it and will be grateful to you.
Step 2
Do not rush to extremes and do not try to become a second mother for them. For a start, calm and friendly communication will be enough. If you see that it is difficult for children to be around you, do not insist on constant walks together. Until you get used to each other, have the husband meet them in neutral territory.
Step 3
Ask your husband if there are any dietary restrictions for children. Allergies, special diet or unloved food - find out all the details. Have a family dinner: cook their favorite meal, or go to a restaurant or kids cafe. Be genuinely interested in their lives, successes, dreams, and plans.
Step 4
Find out what children are interested in, what they love and what they do in their free time. Provide them with the necessary items or hobby tools. Buy movie tickets with their favorite actor and go to the cinema together. Such a pastime does not require active communication, but it will help you build closer contact.
Step 5
Be prepared for the fact that your husband's children will perceive you with hostility and begin to provoke a conflict. Divorce of parents often becomes a real shock for children (especially small ones). And dad's new girlfriend looks like a destroyer of the family in their eyes, even if it is not. Be calm and tactful, and leave parenting issues, including rewards and punishments, to your father. In no case do not speak badly about your ex-wife, for children - this is a mother and a careless rude word addressed to her will automatically make you enemy number one.
Step 6
If, despite all your efforts, you still have not managed to improve relations with your husband's children, give them the right to communicate with the father without your presence. Be wiser and respect your spouse's fatherly feelings. When you have a common child, a faithful and loving dad will come in handy.
