Man is the most incredible creature on our planet. He manages not only to be a separate and unique person, but also to live in a society that sets its own rules and orders. Living among other people, the person himself gradually begins to depend on their behavior and, often, on their opinion of themselves. That is why, receiving a forest and pleasant assessment of our personality, we feel warmer and more joyful in our souls.
It's a pleasure to receive quality compliments. We become more supportive of the person who sees our virtues. But it is very difficult to say compliments correctly and in a timely manner. Indeed, if not guessed with the assessment, quantity or moment of what was said, good intentions can be perceived as insincere flattery, perhaps obliging to something. The response can go already at the subconscious level - a negative and harsh response, distrust, a desire to end the conversation.
But how can this situation be prevented? How do you know that the words you say will be received correctly by establishing contact and softening the situation? To do this, you need to know a few simple principles based primarily on human psychology:
- Feel the mood of the other person. If he is focused on an important problem for him or worried about something, then an unexpected compliment will knock him out of thought and only lead to irritation. But this does not mean that when we are in a bad mood, we do not want to hear pleasant things about ourselves. On the contrary, sometimes sudden warm words can polarize the state of a person. But for this you need to feel the interlocutor well, see his mood and predict his reaction!
- It is the simplest and most effective compliment to point out the merits of those things that a person values and is proud of! All people are children at heart, and if a child constantly carries a toy in his hands, he will be proud to hear words of delight and surprise about it. Likewise in adults: by learning a person's interests, you can easily get to his heart through his own hobby or passion. The main thing is not to overdo it with the number of compliments in the conversation and make them sincerely, and not for any benefit.
- Remember: complimenting should be done in a confident, calm voice. And be ready to prove your opinion - do not throw words around without substantial grounds. From the outside it will look too unnatural. Be honest, and you yourself will understand what kind words your interlocutor wants to hear!
