There are many articles and literature on the relationship between children and adults in the family. Most of the sources emphasize the word "children", already showing the difference between relationships. Yes, it so happened that adults are adults, and children are something special. Creatures that require a separate approach and selective attitude. Is this really so?
Indeed, a small person is more defenseless and needs constant support, love and training. But is it worth it to overdo it, treating children like a crystal vase, or, on the contrary, is it necessary to treat them one hundred percent as full members of the family? Is it worth keeping a child out of the problems of adult society or, on the contrary, blaming him for all his problems and misfortunes?
The first thing that a small person really needs is great love and constant attention. Even leaving him to himself, it is important to make it clear that adults are there, will not go anywhere and are always ready to help and listen.
Food and clothing are secondary issues, they largely depend on the well-being of the family in which the child grows up. But if you think about it, many happy children grow up in families with limited funds.
A small person, so that he grows up self-sufficient, should be taught to be independent from an early age. This does not mean that he does everything himself, but about what is in his capabilities. For example, in the villages to this day, the younger generation has their own responsibilities, which, depending on their age, they can and should perform. Perhaps these are trifles and even if things are done awkwardly, but this allows the children to feel like equal participants. In this way, children learn about their involvement in family affairs.
You can control a child in different ways. It can be unobtrusive observation and direction in the right direction, or it can be in the form of an authoritarian report. What will an adult choose for himself? Of course, rather the first.
The style of raising a child largely depends on the family, its beliefs, and faith. But the main thing is the example of the parents. No matter how much they repeat about bad habits and their inadmissibility. If they do it themselves, do not expect the child to behave differently. Of course, there are cases when a child grows up in a drinking family with aversion to alcohol, but who can guarantee that a particular case will happen again.
And finally, many, trying to raise an independent child, blame all their problems on him. Say, I do not hide anything and share with him as an equal. The fragile psyche of the child only suffers from this, he is morally not ready to take on these problems. Who will grow out of a girl whose mother constantly scolds and calls her father names? Most likely, she will already hate all men in the world when she is little.
