It is rare that a parent has not come across a situation when a child suddenly begins to cheat. Childhood lies can be harmless and fun, but in some cases, the child lies almost constantly. Where does the tendency to lie in childhood come from?
What lies at the heart of children's lies
Imitation. It is not for nothing that children are often compared to sponges that absorb other people's emotions, examples for behavior and imitation, and so on. If a child witnesses a lie, if he is constantly or often in a situation where people are lying around him, especially adults and persons who are authoritative for him, the baby begins to adopt a similar model of behavior. It seems to him that if mom or dad is telling a lie, then this is what he needs to do. Sometimes a child may begin to lie to his parents as if acting out of spite, out of harm, wanting to show his capricious character. However, even for such behavior, the child must have a certain pattern. He can "pick up" a tendency to lie from a favorite hero of a children's book or see how other people lie to each other on the TV screen.
Desire to attract attention. Demonstration is a very typical feature of childhood behavior, and it persists into adolescence. When a child lacks attention from parents, friends, relatives, he begins to invent ways how to get this attention. Many children begin to act through lies. Lying can be harmless when a child fantasizes or embellishes any events in order to hold the attention of adults or peers for a longer time. However, in some cases, the lie can be very harsh and even frightening.
Pathological tendency to lie. The pathological form of lying is manifested by the fact that a child from an early age lies for no reason, on any topic. He does this almost constantly, completely without feeling any remorse. No conversations or educational measures, attempts to shame or scold the little liar do not bring any result. If this tendency is expressed very clearly, it becomes a reason for visiting a child psychiatrist or psychotherapist. There is a certain mental deviation when a person is not aware of his lies. For him, everything that he speaks is the true truth. It is impossible to convince such a person, as well as to cause a feeling of guilt for lying. Such people need appropriate medical attention.
Internal fears and concerns. Very often, a child lies to his parents when he is afraid of punishment, when he feels guilty in any situation. Not wanting to hear how mom or dad swear at him, not wanting to stand in a corner, be responsible for a certain act or upset parents, the child tries to get out of the situation with the help of lies. This behavior is typical for children who grow up in a very strict, tough upbringing. If in the child's mind the image of the father or mother is painted in gloomy tones, if the child has experienced severe humiliation during the punishment for a misdemeanor or the punishment has generated fear inside the child, the child will lie, assuming that this will save him from the consequences.
Lying as a defense of personal territory. This reason why a child is lying is usually relevant for adolescence. It is adolescents who tend to understate a lot, exaggerate or, conversely, underestimate, hide some nuances from their parents. Lying in this case acts as an attempt to protect your personal territory, to close your inner world from curious and intrusive parents. A teenager often lies to his parents in order to teach them a lesson, to dodge their active control, pressure, and guardianship.
Lying as a reaction to the microclimate in the family. It is not uncommon for a child to show his attitude to family conflicts, dramas and situations through lies. Lies act as a reaction to a quarrel between parents or any negative changes in the family. Often in such situations, children's lies are very closely intertwined with fantasies and invented images, so the child tries to protect himself from the negative effects of the family microclimate.
Resentment and desire for revenge. If a child is very offended by his parents for something, it is almost impossible to predict his behavior for sure. Wanting to avenge his feelings and emotions, the child may begin to behave disobediently, be capricious, protest, show negativity and often lie. Anger at parents becomes an excellent basis for the formation of lies.
