"Don't get in, you don't know how." How often such words are heard in playgrounds. Any psychologist just shudders when he hears this. And how can a child learn to ride a bicycle, climb a Swedish wall, ride a scooter if they constantly stop him ?! Behind such phrases lies the fear of parents or grandmothers (even more so) for the health of the baby. In other words, it is overprotective of adults who do not want to let their son or daughter go into independent life.
The worries of moms and dads for the life of their children are intensified if they have already had the experience of serious injuries. Of course, not everyone breaks their bones or gets a concussion in childhood. But there is absolutely not a single person who, when mastering a new skill, would not rip off his knees or get bruises. But parents forget about it or want to protect their kids from everything.
… He gets used to thinking of himself as weak and infirm. The kid will wait until he is removed from the ladder or help. And if adults are not around, he will fly head over heels from there. In psychology, this phenomenon has its own name - learned helplessness syndrome. A person learns to be weak and dependent. It is easy to imagine how difficult it is for a person in adulthood with a similar syndrome.
People's curiosity is the strongest driver of their development. Sooner or later, the child will still sit on a bicycle or climb where it is forbidden. The forbidden fruit is known to be sweet. At the same time, the formula is clearly fixed in the child's brain that he is dependent, inept and does not have a chance to learn something. As a result of learning, don't wait. Such attempts will most often end with injuries, that is, exactly what the adults were afraid of.
To begin with, it is important to realize the fact that I, as a parent, inhibit the development of my own child, stopping him in new actions. They learn everything gradually. No one (except for highly gifted people) learns everything at once. It is better to rephrase your fear for the health of the baby into a permission with a restriction:
In this case, the zone of independence must be gradually increased: for example. It is important to allow the baby to “fill its own bruises and bumps” in acceptable safe conditions. Let him get scratched better and understand how to perform the movements correctly than hurt him later.
Every parent has to put up with the fact that the child is gradually moving away. The distance between him and his mother is constantly increasing. An adult is vital for a baby every minute, but a teenager is already only sometimes in the evenings. In order for a child to grow up healthy and inquisitive, you need to help him gain independence gradually and at the right time.
