Women tend to nag men for a variety of reasons. They do this not at all from their sadistic nature, but only because they do not know other ways to reach the understanding of a loved one. How to negotiate controversial issues with a representative of the strong half of humanity, without causing him irritation or a defensive reaction?
1. Always be clear about your position on any issue. To do this, first formulate clearly for yourself what you are really ready to go for, and what actions cause you internal disagreement.
2. Indicate your point of view not categorically and not in the form of an ultimatum: “I will not allow anyone to talk to me like that!”; "Either we are getting married, or we are breaking up." This is not necessary. Express your opinion gently and firmly: "I like you very much, but I'm not ready for cohabitation" or "I will follow you wherever you call, but I will not feed a healthy man at my own expense."
3. It is important to show your attitude to any situation right at the moment of what is happening or in advance "agree on the shore" about how you see your relationship at the main significant points, but not after some time, when the context is lost, and the relevance of the issue is exhausted. After a fight, it makes no sense to wave your fists.
4. Do not give up on your words and do not give up your positions, otherwise you will not be readable. If you say today that you are not ready to do this and that, and tomorrow, after his persuasion, you agree to everything - your words are worthless, and therefore you. Even when a man is silent, he will draw conclusions and begin to lose respect for you. This rule also works in the opposite direction: when you promise something, your words must be confirmed by actions. Otherwise, you will not be trusted.
5. Do not blame, blame or make claims: “You are using me”; "You are constantly lying"; "You…". It is better to exclude the pronoun "you" from your speech altogether in the context of accusations. In these ways, you will not achieve not only the desired result (correcting the state of affairs), but even understanding. You will only cause a defensive reaction, which is expressed in different forms: a person can close himself off from you or start attacking in response. In any case, you will not solve the problem like that. Talk only about your feelings or feelings: “I’m not ready to talk to you in that tone”; "I hate it when you do that." Or ask questions: "Do you mean that …?"; "Do I understand you correctly?"
6. Speak softly. When a woman raises her voice, on a subconscious level, a man perceives any of her words as aggression towards him. He involuntarily has an association with his mother, who screamed when she was angry with him and was unhappy with him. The "skirt - skirt" transfer is triggered: that voice raised when she scolded, and this one in raised tones - that means she accuses.
