Due to heavy conflicts with the mother-in-law and mother-in-law, more than one family broke up. Despite the colorful examples of friends and relatives, parents continue to be at enmity with the chosen ones of their children, making life difficult for all parties to the conflict. Therefore, it is better to establish contact with the future son-in-law in advance in order to avoid problems in the future.
Don't over complicate
Before thinking about the opinion you will make on your future son-in-law, decide on your attitude towards him. Remember everything your daughter told you about him. Perhaps you are familiar with him, and already have your own idea of a person. After analyzing your opinion of a guy, think about the fact that he is also someone's child. Perhaps his mother is also worried about his choice and is afraid of the difficulties that may arise in his path. So try to tune in to the fact that for you he is just a child. Perhaps then you will not be skeptical about him, and this will not affect your behavior in any way. In the end, the falsity is very much felt.
Demonstrate to the young man that you are happy to have him in your family and that you respect your daughter's choice. During the meeting, do not interrupt your daughter and do not in any way demonstrate that you will influence her. Often, the relationship of the son-in-law with the mother-in-law deteriorates precisely because she takes an excessive part in the life of the newlyweds. Do not find fault, but also do not curry favor with the future son-in-law. Treat him as you would any welcome guest. If the acquaintance takes place at your home, help him to get comfortable, because you want to become one family. Remember that a person is always drawn to where he is warmly welcomed.
Get to know him better
Start a conversation about what the young man likes. Try to ask questions in a friendly manner. You should understand that he is also worried, and that he does not feel very comfortable on the exam. Information about his predilections will be useful to you in the future, during new meetings and situations when you need to give gifts. It is very useful to be always appropriate. Find out if the guy has any common interests with your family. Perhaps you all love chess or skiing. Of course, he will hardly want to spend every weekend with you. But having something in common connects people well.
Think carefully, maybe you could be useful to him. For example, his grandmother is ill, and you know a good doctor who will see an old woman for free. But in no case try to influence the future son-in-law with your authority. Talk to him on an equal footing. Don't think about the age difference. This is actually not such a big reason to speak down.
If the meeting was successful, try to build on the success a little later. Always stick to the same communication style. Do not try to read lectures, even if your daughter complains to you. Usually, lovers reconcile very quickly, and your relationship will be ruined. Your daughter will suffer the most in this situation. Therefore, make it a habit to only intervene in very serious situations, but never get personal.
