Is your husband always dissatisfied with everything and forces you to do what you absolutely do not want? Don't put up with it. There is more than one opportunity to rebuff even the most inveterate despot and turn the tide in your favor.
Instructions
Step 1
Answer all your husband's claims confidently and calmly. If he begins to speak to you in a raised voice, do not remain silent. However, try not to point out his shortcomings when communicating with your spouse. It is possible that he, showing aggression towards you, wants to increase his self-esteem at the expense of others and will recall in response all your mistakes. Do not give him such pleasure and do not inflame him even more. Try to turn the conversation to a neutral topic.
Step 2
Think about what the husband's dissatisfaction can actually be connected with. Perhaps he is in trouble at work, health problems, disagreements with his best friend, etc. But do not ask him about it right away so as not to cause a new outburst of indignation. He can also regard your participation as a desire to humiliate and hurt. Pick an opportune moment to talk and try to figure out what worries him. If he screams or threatens again, you will have to decide if all your worries are worth continuing with this person.
Step 3
Don't try to please him in everything. If he really has too low self-esteem, and not a completely understandable reaction to temporary difficulties, he can quickly get used to your reliability. And it is not far from here to manifestations of real despotism, when any disobedience is brutally suppressed.
Step 4
If it seems to you that you are already in a slave-slave-owner relationship with your spouse, do not absolve yourself of some of the blame for the situation. Think about what your actions could have caused this development of events. Do not justify everything with "blind love" for the tyrant. In a relationship between a man and a woman, both partners have the right to be themselves. And if you still cannot imagine life without a spouse, you will have to make an effort to overcome this addiction.
Step 5
Do what you've always done well. Perhaps you used to dance well, draw, sew. Resume relationships with old friends and girlfriends, make new ones. If your spouse begins to actively object to your hobbies and meetings, think about who he really needs: a resigned servant or a self-sufficient woman who really likes to live. You can respect and love your husband, despite all the difficulties of communicating with him. But he, in turn, must treat you with understanding.
Step 6
If you are dependent on your husband in material terms, and he, in the event of a divorce, threatens to leave you without funds and a roof over your head, think about who he thinks you are, since he allows himself such statements. Decide if being a married woman is worth the sacrifice. If, on the contrary, he lives at your expense, stop “feeling sorry” for your husband. Help him find a good job or get an education. In case of his refusal, you should decide: will you continue to fulfill all the whims of the slacker or will you still show him the door.
