A lonely woman with a child may well meet a man who is ready to accept not only her, but also a "ready" son or daughter. Although in life together, it sometimes turns out that everything is not so smooth between the stepfather and the adopted child. It is unlikely that it will be possible to make a man fall in love with someone who is not his child; pressure is not an assistant here. But maternal wisdom will help you find the right approach to this delicate situation.
Instructions
Step 1
Mom needs to understand that most men are more selfish than women. Therefore, in a life together, you need to build such conditions so that a man does not feel left out of attention.
Step 2
Remember that if you have a really warm and partner relationship with a man, i.e. no one is trying to suppress anyone and force them to do something, then the chances that the stepfather's relationship with the child will improve are very high. Therefore, take a detached view of your family life and, if necessary, make adjustments to your behavior.
Step 3
Do not try to force events, give the man and the child time to get to know and understand each other and contribute to this yourself. The best way is to spend time together pleasantly and search for common interests.
Step 4
Please note that if the man himself openly spoke to you about the fact that he cannot love your child or has a feeling of dislike for him, then this is a good sign. Since a frank conversation is a sign of trust and a desire to change something.
Step 5
If a man does not dare to talk about it, then raise the question yourself. The main thing is to do it in a very tactful manner, in no case to blame anyone, but to try to understand your partner. Perhaps just one such conversation will be enough for the situation to begin to improve.
Step 6
If there is a minor conflict, try to smooth it out without clearly taking sides.
Step 7
Talk to your child to understand their point of view and fears. Show both parties that you understand them and do not demand the impossible at the moment.
Step 8
Perhaps an open conversation among the three will help, but you can only understand how appropriate it is by talking frankly with everyone, face to face.
Step 9
If the child is still very young and annoys the man with his whims, screams, etc., then it is very important to keep calm herself. The more balanced and welcoming you are, the calmer both the baby and your partner will be.
Step 10
Be fair to both the man and the child. Do not constantly feel sorry for your child, it will rather worsen the state of affairs.
Step 11
If the situation is too tense, the man is constantly in conflict and does not try to take any steps towards him, then you should think about whether he loves you and whether you need to live together. After all, if the atmosphere in the family is constantly tense, then hardly anyone in it will be happy.
