Did your yesterday's kind and obedient baby look like a little monster? Whims, stubbornness and real tantrums are well known to parents of three-year-olds. How to behave correctly so as not to harm anyone?
At the age of 2.5 to 3.5 years, the child, and with him and his whole family, is going through a crisis. The kid has already outgrown the established rules and procedures. He demands change. The consequence of this crisis is perestroika, the development of volitional qualities and independence. But the parents are most worried about the symptoms: unwillingness to do what they say, refusal to eat, sleep, play, tears, screams, tantrums.
Remember, bad behavior and tears do not exist on their own. If a child is naughty, there is always a reason for this. He cannot convey to you his problems and desires in an adult language and does it the way he knows how. Perhaps your baby is lacking your attention, or there are problems in the family that he or she is feeling.
It is very important that all family members adhere to the same parenting principles. Agree with your grandparents and nannies what to allow and what to forbid. Try to convey to them the importance of your unanimity. Otherwise, the child will be confused and this will affect his behavior.
Psychologists have long rejected physical punishment. This behavior humiliates the child, makes him aggressive. Try other methods. Most often, your indifference, lack of attention is triggered very quickly. For example, a child in a store stomps and screams because he wants some kind of toy that you are not going to buy him. First, speak in a calm voice about your decision, explain the reason. If the child continues to “have fun,” tell him to talk to him when he’s calmed down, and stop paying attention to him until he stops crying. You will see, he will get bored very quickly. Do not judge the child, but his actions. Do not say "you are bad", say "you acted badly."
If shopping tantrums are your strong point, don't take your child to the store. Leave it with someone at home or ask a relative to go shopping. Of course, not everyone has such an opportunity, but if you have it, then use it.
The child wants independence. If you forbid him everything, then he will not grow up. Give your baby freedom of action in everything that does not pose a danger to his health. Does he want to eat himself? Bon Appetit! Want to dress yourself? You are welcome! Want to cut a salad? Give him a plastic knife - let him scrape.
Dressing is a separate topic for three-year-olds. In order not to be late for kindergarten, start getting ready in advance. There is no need to wait for miracles of instant readiness from the child at the last minute. He needs at least 30 minutes. To avoid “I don’t want to, I won’t,” suggest several matching dresses (pants, shirts) to choose from. This will create the illusion of independent decision-making.
Try to give choice in everything. What toys to play, what to eat for dinner, where to go for a walk … Even the choice in receiving punishment. Having an alternative will teach your child to make decisions and save you time and hassle.
To put your child to bed on time, observe the daily routine, get ready for bed in advance. Turn off the TV, dim the lights, talk about your day, read a book. This will gradually set your baby up to sleep.
Be patient and help your child get through this difficult period. The main thing is calmness. Lack of violent reaction is the most valuable thing for you at this stage. The more nervous you are, the more the baby is capricious and rereading.
