We all know marital relationships have to be worked on, but the work doesn't have to be hard. Everyday little things will serve as good for the relationship as heroic deeds.
We have all heard stories about how "everyday life" destroyed a marriage. To avoid this, you need to take preventive measures.
Focus on positive aspects
There are no ideal people. We all sometimes do and do things that upset or hurt our partner. Criticism in this case is not the best choice of action, since it will only cause a desire to defend. Instead, focus on your partner's best qualities and support and encourage them.
Apologize for mistakes
Have the courage to ask for forgiveness. Moreover, it should not be in such a form: "I'm sorry that you understood it that way" or "I'm sorry that you were upset" - since such an apology carries a hint that your partner did not have enough intelligence to understand correctly. It is quite another matter to take responsibility for a lie or an impartial act. This demonstrates that you value relationships more than righteousness.
Stop blaming your partner
During a quarrel, reproaches and accusations fly one after another. Your task is to get rid of this manifestation of feelings. It is better to talk about yourself, about your feelings, using "I" -messages: instead of: "You are to blame!" - use: "I am terribly offended and unpleasant," - and so on.
To look at each other
Look up from your phone screen and look at your partner. Often times, during the day, we simply do not have enough time to pick up the non-verbal cues that are so important to understanding each other. By observing a partner, even for a few seconds, we catch up.
Appreciate your differences
Different people cope with conflict situations in different ways: someone needs to think it over first, but prefers to deal with something "in hot pursuit". Discuss how each of you approaches conflict resolution and try to find a compromise. Do not scold each other for different approaches, rather appreciate the frankness.
Try to hear, not just listen
Every person wants to feel important and needed. One of the simplest and most powerful ways to demonstrate this is to simply listen carefully. Put all your gadgets aside, look at your partner, and respond to what they say with subtle questions. Couples who hear each other's daily events live much happier than those who don't.
Show your partner that you value them
Praise your partner's good qualities, admire their successes, and encourage their endeavors. This is very important for a truly happy relationship.
Respect each other
Unfortunately, many couples forget this golden rule. Treat your partner the way you would like to be treated. Any violence (both physical and emotional) is unacceptable. We are all imperfect, but if you hurt your partner, offended him, be sure to apologize and try not to repeat this again.
