Many psychological problems of a person come from childhood. The most serious factor that causes the emergence of complexes and self-doubt, contributing to the development of problems in communication, is the child's dislike in childhood.
What threatens a person with dislike in childhood
Not so many people can describe their childhood as cloudlessly happy. However, the greatest problems in adulthood are caused not by the lack of expensive toys and clothes, but by the lack of unconditional love and attention from parents.
The child's need for love is satisfied when the parents inform him that he is needed, dear, necessary. These messages are transmitted through caress, glances, gentle touches, kisses, as well as through emotional words: “It's good that we have you!”, “It's great when we are together!”. These love signs help the child develop psychologically and emotionally.
Lack of love makes the baby feel unnecessary, superfluous. He becomes either painfully timid and shy, or aggressive and cruel. In adolescence, an unloved child most often begins to rebel. A quiet and calm kid, whom his parents praised only for good behavior and deprived of love in other situations, as a teenager, begins to treat his parents in the same way.
An adult unloved in childhood cannot love and accept himself. This is fraught with the development of an inferiority complex, uncertainty, suspiciousness. Often there are various phobias, obsessive states, neuroses. In some cases, the individual appears to be aggressive towards the world around him and all other people.
Lack of love also negatively affects relationships in adult life. Subconsciously, a person ceases to believe that he is worthy of warm feelings, because his dearest and closest people did not love him. He becomes cold and callous, alcohol or drug addiction often appears. And worst of all, such an individual does not give love to his children.
How to Show Unconditional Parental Love
Always remember that the love of parents is the basis on which the whole future life of a person is built. Therefore, do not dismiss the baby, do not move away under the pretext of being busy. Not only play with your child, but also share feelings and emotions with him, caress him.
Don't be afraid to pamper your child with unconditional love. Love him, and evaluate - his actions. If the baby has done something unseemly, condemn his act, and always address the child himself only with warm feelings.
How to live if you were not loved as a child
If you yourself suffer from childish dislike, the first thing to do is to forgive your parents. You cannot change the fact that it was these people who brought you into this world, but you are in control of your life. From the accumulated grievances, you yourself suffer more. Therefore, try to find the reasons for certain actions of the parents, justify them, forgive and move on.
Learn intimate relationships, ways of expressing emotions and love. Psychological training can help you with this. Remember that you are loved by someone. If your parents could not give you warmth, you can get it from friends, children, a loved one, or a pet.
