The development of trusting relationships begins with a revision of their beliefs and attitudes, changes in their behavior. When you trust, you rely on the maturity and autonomy (age appropriate) of the child. These qualities are shaped by your influence. This formation occurs most easily when you show enough analytical and reflective abilities and know how to find a common language with your child.
Instructions
Step 1
Analyze how your distrust manifests itself, what thoughts and fears accompany it. By not trusting, you limit the children, making decisions for them and controlling them. Are you afraid for your child's health, are you worried that he will fall under someone else's influence, or make a mistake? You can often be visited by anger and indignation: "How dare he do this?" Your emotions and fears are legitimate, moreover, you are obliged to think two steps ahead, because a child, due to his age, is not always able to do it himself.
Step 2
Now look at the situation through the eyes of a child. Whether he is an elementary school student, a teenager or a young man, he is, first of all, a person and has the right to make independent decisions. Give him this right. This is really important for the child, because gives him a certain experience, confidence in his abilities. Agree that the ability to act without looking back at someone is useful in life. Whether he knows how to do it or not is another question that depends on you.
Step 3
Look at yourself through the eyes of a child. And with a look from the outside, evaluate your actions. How often do you jump to conclusions? On emotions, without understanding, make decisions that limit the little person? You follow the easy path of prohibitions, take "false educational" measures that in fact do not lead to the desired results, alienate the child from you and embitter him. And you are an adult, which means that you are a more experienced and reasonable person, who of all the possibilities uses only one - authority (or authoritarianism, to be more precise). Are you not becoming like a capricious child, with the only difference that you have power over your own children in your hands, and even that is often dubious?
Step 4
After this analysis, summarize. Your arsenal of actions can be much broader than threats and punishments. If you are afraid of the influence of bad companies, teach your child to choose friends, resist the influence, make independent decisions, or say no. Are you worried that your child will make a mistake? Understand that error is an experience; all mistakes cannot be avoided. Teach you to analyze situations, look to the future, take into account several factors, be responsible for your decisions.
Step 5
Regularly, in any non-conflict, everyday situation, teach your child to think, talk with him, discuss what is interesting to him. Your trust will be based on the knowledge that the child is warned or knows how to act correctly in any situation.
Step 6
Learn to respect your child. Be attentive to his feelings, opinions. Learn to communicate with him on an equal footing, without threats and insults. Then only the child will be open with you, and it will be easier for you to understand the train of his thoughts, you will know which of his beliefs can be gently corrected. But along with this, learn to accept and understand the "dissent" of children. Developing criticality and independence of thinking in them, sooner or later you will come across a child's own opinion, which has a right to exist.
