The wedding fanfare died down, the gifts were unpacked, the donated money was spent, the newlyweds returned from their honeymoon trip. Instead of love confessions, accusations and insults are heard against each other. Nothing strange, this is a natural development of relations. You just have to go through the grinding process.
To survive the grinding process, you need to be tolerant of each other's shortcomings, unselfish, strive to understand, be able to talk about problems and hear. Only together can we solve the problems that do not disappear from slamming the door and leaving to the parents.
In order to find a compromise, you need to know the enemy by sight, i.e. know the root causes of disputes.
Reason 1: Emotional
Wedding chores, the celebration itself, honeymoon - all these events are full of impressions. After them, when life enters its usual course and becomes a routine, the spouses experience emotional devastation, apathy and, as a result, irritation and dissatisfaction with each other. New joint goals, hobbies and tasks will help to avoid this: renovation or expansion of living space, moving, traveling in the near future, having a child, pair yoga classes, going to the pool, dancing, etc.
A common problem is projecting parental marriage onto your own. The husband is sure that his young wife is obliged to keep the house in the same perfect cleanliness or cook delicious borscht, like his mother. And the wife believes that the young husband is the same jack-of-all-trades like her father. But this is impossible. All people are different. We must come to terms with this and love our other half for what it is.
Reason 2: Life
It is fair to divide household duties equally, because they are capable of destroying any romance, it is worth putting them on someone else's shoulders. Cooking dinner together on the day off has a positive effect on relationships. Be more tolerant of each other. Sometimes, if for some reason a spouse cannot take out the trash, you can do it yourself without hysterics. Or, if the wife did not have time to cook dinner, do not make a scandal, but go to a cafe. The main thing is that it should be one-time and not become the norm.
Reason 3: Money
Money can very well become a stumbling block in your relationship. Before marriage, spouses spent their earnings at their own discretion. After the wedding, there is a need for the formation of a family budget and joint spending, in which it is necessary to consult with each other.
It is better to immediately discuss the financial side of the issue: who is responsible for the mandatory monthly payments, how much everyone can spend on themselves, agree to jointly make decisions on large purchases, etc.
No matter how grandiose the problems at the beginning of family life may seem, they are all jointly overcome by love. Go towards each other and do not forget to give in.
