The influence of the psychological state of parents on children is very great. Especially when it comes to such a stable structure as self-esteem. How can a mother's self-image affect her baby?
First, children mirror the behavior of their parents. Mom, as the closest person, until a certain time remains a complete model of behavior and even feeling. How mom behaves is perceived without judgment. Everything she does is right. An example is taken from my mother. Of course, if you show insecurity and unnecessary worries, it is their child who will copy. And if he is also limited in communication with other people who could become an example, he simply has nowhere to learn to behave differently.
The second point how a mother's self-esteem affects a child is the peculiarities of upbringing. Confident women create the necessary conditions for a healthy growing up of a child. They do not pamper too much, do not allow themselves to sit on their neck, but at the same time they know how to listen to feelings. This is what parents with low self-esteem lack.
Insecure women tend to adhere to two types of upbringing: overprotective or, conversely, dictate. In both cases, children do not feel protected in this vast world. Then the energy that could go to adequate development, the development of external space, is spent on overcoming internal anxiety. The child is more nervous, squeezed, begins to focus on the opinion of everyone around - life in such constant stress sooner or later leads to somatic diseases.
Sometimes there is a reaction of overcompensation, which manifests itself in the child's deliberately active and aggressive behavior. However, the internal anxiety, with which he copes with such demonstrative behavior, does not disappear anywhere and continues to undermine the child's nervous system from the inside.
Practical advice:
1. The very first thing to do is to recognize and acknowledge the problem. It exists and we need to solve it somehow. Denying this problem will not lead to anything good, only you will waste time.
2. Next, observe how your self-esteem is reflected in the upbringing of children and try to get around sharp corners. A healthy upbringing consists in the ability to listen and understand the child, to satisfy his needs, but at the same time to be able to limit and create your own reasonable rules.
3. In addition, women with low self-esteem are characterized by increased anxiety. Please note that, if possible, it is not broadcast to the child. Learn to be bold and proactive around him.
4. Solve the problem from the inside. If you can't come to an adequate self-esteem on your own, you should find a specialist who will help you with this.
