For parents of teenagers, one of the most relevant topics is what to talk about with a teenager so that he hears you and you hears him.
The first and most important rule is to talk to a teenager about himself
Adolescence is a time when changes take place in a child's life, and the child himself, physically and mentally, changes his attitude towards himself and those around him. The teenager is in search of his “I”, his identity. Therefore, it is important to discuss with the teenager his feelings, the changes taking place, help to understand himself, to cope with the hormonal and emotional storm. At the same time, it is important to speak not in the tone of moralizing and notations, but to become a wise advisor and friend who can be trusted. Talk with your teenager about what he is interested in - about his hobbies, favorite music, books, films, computer games. Show a sincere interest in what the teenager is saying, try to immerse yourself in his world, because he will instantly distinguish simulated attention from the real one.
But at the same time, you should not try and get into the soul of a teenager, because "I am a mother, and you have to tell me everything." Also, having received a pass to the world of hobbies and experiences of a teenager, do not try to reshape it in your own way and set your own rules - otherwise you will be asked to leave. At this time, the person is trying to be independent, therefore, it is possible that the child will not tell you to everyone. You have to come to terms with this. Understand that this is not a manifestation of deceit, secrecy and is done "for evil" to the parents. It's just that the child has matured, he realizes and sets some boundaries, protecting his fragile newborn individuality.
The second category of topics is about what a teenager wants to know about
And this is, first of all, the topics of sexuality, gender relations, contraception. No matter how difficult it is for some parents to talk about this, education in such important and delicate issues should not be trusted only on the “street”. This will save your teenager from many risks and problems and will help improve your relationship. After all, if you expect frankness and trust from a teenager, then there should be no taboo topics.
And third - talk about yourself
Adolescence is a period when a person begins to critically evaluate his parents, who were previously an indisputable ideal. Do not hope - you will not be able to hide behind the mask of the ideal and suppress the teenager with authority. Learn to admit mistakes, share with doubts, and most importantly - your successful experience, because this is exactly what the teenager lacks. This way you can bond and become a friend and advisor to your child, and you can maintain this trusting relationship for life.
