In communicating with our children, we sometimes make mistakes, not thinking that over time they accumulate, and the child can move away from us. How can you avoid this?
Instructions
Step 1
Take time for your child, put things aside if he came to share something with you. Listening to your child, you need to turn to face him, go down one level with him or sit down next to him. If he is upset about something, then sit him on his knees or hold his hand. Your child should feel that you are interested in their story.
Step 2
If the baby talks about being sad or scared, you need to pay attention to this. From your words "this is nonsense, keep playing" fear or sadness will not disappear from him, he will be left alone with this feeling, will understand that something is wrong with him, will begin to be ashamed of it and "will close". Share his feelings, saying something like this: "Now you are scared or sad - this is normal, I also felt it at your age …".
Step 3
Stop lecturing, advising, criticizing, warning, and blaming. Most often, this does not work for children. They feel your pressure, boredom, guilt, disrespect for independence. This position of a parent, parent "from above" irritates the child, he will not have a desire to share anything. And most importantly, the child will develop low self-esteem.
Step 4
Do you want your child to listen to you? Then tell him about your feelings and experiences. Speak in the first person, about yourself, not about the child and his behavior. For example: "I hate it if the bedroom is so dirty." Such messages allow us to express negative feelings in a way that is not offensive to the child.
Step 5
The rules, requirements, restrictions and prohibitions in the family between the parents must be agreed upon. The child needs to explain them, but there should not be too many of them. Avoid an authoritarian parenting style, consider your child's feelings, interests and needs, not forgetting, of course, your own.
