Young families, despite the still raging hormones, after starting a life together, often face problems in sex. And if, in addition to youth, there is inexperience in matters of family life, then the problem is not solved by calm discussions due to the temperament and ideas about the ideal marriage of young people. Why are there problems in sex after the wedding, how to fix the situation?
In illusions, we picture ourselves a happy life with a loved one, without quarrels and conflict situations, full of passion and unrestrained sex several times a day. Indeed, the honeymoon and the first weeks go something like this. Young people are happy, carefree, devote all their free time to each other and, as a rule, they do not have any thoughts about another scenario. But time passes and serious questions about further actions emerge by themselves. Who will make the money? Will they be enough for life and entertainment? Who will wash the dishes, prepare to receive guests and take care of breakfast, lunch and dinner? This is where everyday life begins.
The main causes of problems in sex
Sexual problems are not uncommon, even in young families. The following factors can lead to them:
- moral and psychological unpreparedness of the spouses for family life. This refers to the unwillingness to face obstacles, problems and frustrations.
- education of one of the spouses. The way of the family is imprinted on the child. Parental behavior, excessive guardianship, principles of distribution of roles - all these nuances are visible, unfortunately, after the start of family life and often run counter to the upbringing and views of the second spouse.
On this basis, quarrels arise. Someone can smooth out the conflict and come to a compromise. Someone fundamentally does not need changes. The resulting imbalance also affects the sexual sphere. And here you can talk about violent sex after a quarrel only a few times. Further, discontent, like a snowball, will only grow, and the desire to come to naught.
- disappointment in the spouse. Previously, you saw in him a strong man, but in fact you observe how he awkwardly tries to hammer in a nail? Or, at first, you admired the beauty and grace of your wife, but you got a disheveled girl with greasy hair. At first it seems cute, but every day it becomes more annoying. Psychological awareness of the partner's failure leads to a decrease in sexual desire.
- pregnancy and childbirth. Restriction of sexual relations, the appearance of a baby, caring for him, fatigue, postpartum depression are some of the main reasons for the lack of desire after childbirth. Couples who love and respect each other will cope with this, relationships without mutual understanding and respect have every chance of failing.
- biorhythms of spouses. For example, the husband is an owl and the wife is a lark. At night, the husband is ready for battle, and the wife falls off her feet from fatigue. In the morning, vice versa. If desired, biorhythms can be adjusted.
In order to avoid sexual problems in a relationship, you need to be able to hear and understand your soul mate. Understand that all problems are solvable with respect and understanding within the family. Remember that after deciding to tie their own fates, the responsibility for the well-being and happiness of the marriage rests with both spouses.
