As long as there is at least some statistics of divorces between spouses, parents will have to explain the regrettable fact that their father is not around. The way the mother and other relatives do this can greatly affect the child's attitude, self-esteem and gender-role relationships in the future. Therefore, you need to approach the conversation about your father as responsibly and with great respect for your ex-spouse, no matter what happens between you.
Instructions
Step 1
Speak the truth in a child-friendly way. Even a child should be aware of a tragic event and at different age periods should be able to comprehend it in his own way. You should not deceive the child and feed him with the expectations of his father's return, the child will grow up and begin to understand a lot without you, and the resentment against the mother for deceiving will become a needle in the subconscious.
Step 2
Tell your child how love began and what a good relationship you had. The fact that he was a welcome child in the family and everyone, including dad, was looking forward to him. This, in a sense, will warm the child's soul, ease his feelings. There is no need to go into the details of how this relationship deteriorated, it is better to limit ourselves to a short phrase about how they often began to quarrel and could not live together further.
Step 3
Use an example of someone you know to explain the situation to your baby. Or his peers to show the differences between people. Children from three to four years old already understand how different they are, for example, they like some children and do not like others. This is a good support for explaining the dissimilarity of the characters of mom and dad. But you should not blame your father for this, explain the fact of the difference between people as a given.
Step 4
Talk about what happened with restraint, but carefully, with respect for your father and love for past experiences. It was your experience, and as a result, you have a precious treasure. Therefore, gain the wisdom and strength to appreciate what happened. In no case do not pour out your soul and do not show your resentment, anger and any other negativity towards your father. Thus, you will only cause a feeling of guilt for your relationship in the child, but the child will not stop loving his father, as the nature of the baby requires.
Step 5
Explain to your child that the absence of a father is not an indicator that he is lonely or less loved than other children. Do not try to give the child more out of guilt than is given to other children - super-custody, the fulfillment of any whims is already surplus. Just show how you love him, how much his grandparents love him, hug and pay attention more often, listen to the child and talk to him.
