Many negative emotions in children and adolescents are naturally overcome as they grow up. These emotions include, for example, anxiety before parting with loved ones, fear of the unknown, and others.
The expansion of social ties helps to overcome these fears - in social relations the child learns to find the true reasons for his fears.
It should be noted that in the life of a child, some fears are quickly replaced by others. Small children, having concrete thinking, express their attitude to those objects that they encounter in reality ("I love my mother", "I hate garlic"). In adolescents, as they develop abstract thinking, there is a love of freedom, independence, intolerance to manifestations of injustice, etc.
Home, parents, friends can act as an object of love for a teenager, but love for the opposite sex is especially dramatic at this age. Love for a teenager is a prerequisite for establishing close, tender, sincere relationships with a peer who is an ideal, an example to follow. The object of love, as a rule, is an authority, it is surrounded by a romantic halo, which is facilitated by the rich imagination of a teenager.
Broderick's research, who studied about 1000 adolescents 10-11 years of age, shows that many adolescents during the last year of their lives were in a state of love with members of the opposite sex. About 50% of adolescents 12-13 years old and more than 70% of adolescents 16-17 years old have also been in love.
According to Erickson, first love for a teenager is a prerequisite for the formation of his self-esteem. In the object of love, the teenager sees his own reflection. It is for this reason that many lovers spend so much time figuring out the ideals and passions of their idol, while comparing themselves and their emotional world with the life of a partner.
The basis of true love is selflessness, the willingness to give up any claims for the sake of your feelings. Without proper self-esteem, such feelings cannot form. Accordingly, in order for a teenager to be able to establish relations with the object of his sympathy, so that he can understand and recognize his feelings, adults should, first of all, help him with the formation of his own adequate self-esteem.
