The person you were once in love with and then broke up. There was everything: pain, resentment, and hope for a reunion, which never happened. Moreover, for many years you have not even seen each other, perhaps deliberately avoiding such meetings. But now the opportunity presented itself to see this person, what could it turn out to be?
When you can't date your former love
People are not as simple as they would sometimes like to be. It happens that you broke up with the full knowledge that this relationship was superfluous in your life. Or maybe you broke away from the person "with pain and blood" and worried for a long time. Now you are all right, however, sometimes you still remember your former love, and your soul becomes somehow anxious. But you are not living in the past. You have a new partner, communication with whom you are satisfied. Love and mutual respect is a solid foundation on which you build your new relationship.
However, you are well aware that feelings for your ex are not completely gone. Despite the fact that you love your present life and do not want to return to the past, it still attracts and delays. “I’ll just look at him (or at her), and that’s all,” so you persuade yourself. But deep down you know how it ends. Old feelings won't come back. A relationship with someone from the past can never be rebuilt. But to destroy new ones in a sudden impulse is easy. Or you will hold back, really be content with one meeting, but the meeting will cost you dearly. You will unleash what is just beginning to heal.
It is better to refuse to meet with your former love if you are not sure that you have no feelings for this person.
When to date your ex
You perfectly understand that you cannot enter the same river twice. You have changed, and so has this person. Both you and your ex have a good personal life, and you are both married or have a strong, happy relationship. It is possible that in the past, you have been bound by friendly feelings rather than genuine passion. It was interesting and fun for you together.
In this case, the meeting can go well if you can find a common language and speak without remembering the past.
Psychologists recommend dating a former partner only to those people who do not hold grudges and are not fascinated by the past.
Much depends on your character
There are people who have a talent for being friends with their exes. They sometimes even manage to do what others consider a miracle: to gather at the same table several of their former partners and one present, and at the same time have a great time, being sure that everyone present is sincerely having fun. If you know how to be friends, if you have forgotten the past grievances and feelings that gripped you, then meeting with your former love can be the beginning of a new excellent friendship.
