After divorce, fathers are not always willing to participate in the lives of their children. And a woman has to raise a child on her own. If this happened, and you stepped into a new world with your child, then try not to make mistakes that are typical for single mothers.
Try to be always strong
The position to be always strong and to be able to do everything is worthy, but extremely dangerous. Dealing with problems alone, rejecting help, and always being “on duty” can lead to nervous exhaustion. But the child has no one closer to you and you need to remember this. So feel free to accept help from friends and family. Involve grandparents in caring for the child. Cooperate with the same single mothers, and help each other.
Focus exclusively on the child
After a divorce, many mothers decide that they should devote the rest of their lives exclusively to the child. Live only by his needs and desires. So supposedly you can compensate for the missing parent. This position is fraught with problems in the future. First, being the only reason for someone to live is an unbearable and excessively heavy burden. Especially for a child, even if he does not yet realize it. Secondly, where is the guarantee that you will not reproach the child when he grows up: "I put my whole life on you …" Children are happy only when their parents are happy. So work, meet your friends, and do your favorite hobby. After all, children take interest in life from their parents.
Feeling guilty
You feel guilty about the fact that after the divorce, the child is being raised in a single-parent family. It seems to you that this circumstance will have a bad effect on his future destiny. Or you are looking for a new relationship because you want to be happy. And your conscience now and then strives to return all thoughts only about the child. Very quickly, the baby counts on a subconscious level all your throwing and will manipulate you. Of course, it is not easy and quick to get rid of the feeling of guilt, but it should be minimized. Find a hobby that will interest both you and your child. For example: swimming pool, reading books before bed, handicrafts.
You avoid the question: "Where is daddy?" and speak badly about him
The more you try to get away from this question, the sooner the child will feel tension, pain and resentment. The child will ask this question again and again until he receives an answer. At some point, you may not be able to stand it and in the heat of the moment you will speak badly about the baby's father. The child will project the spoken words in his address and will consider himself as bad. Therefore, do not avoid answering this question. Talk in a relaxed atmosphere. Be sure to clarify that although you do not live together, you still love your baby. Be sure to say good words about the child's father, even if you have to step on your pride. The child will grow up and figure it out himself.
Try not to communicate with "complete" families
You may be uncomfortable with full-fledged families. Or you think your child will feel left out. But this is absolutely only your subjective opinion. On the contrary, a wide circle of communication will help you to get out of a stressful state, and the child will see a wide variety of behaviors. The main thing is to perceive the existence of your little family as the norm.
