In order not to offend a partner, many women diligently portray passionate moans in bed, not getting satisfaction. Each time after that, they hesitate to admit that it was not so good at all, and they do it all over and over and over again. How do you get out of this vicious circle?
New reasons for pretending
If in the old days sex was considered an occupation only for the satisfaction of men and women imitated indescribable bliss only in order to quickly end it, now everything is not so simple. Be that as it may, modern women continue to play the game "show a reliable orgasm", but for a completely different reason. Now the ability to get an orgasm is not an indicator of female solvency as a mistress, but of male art in bed. And often in order to help a man feel his masculinity and skill in love, women resort to old tricks - pretense.
Why you shouldn't lie
Orgasm is not just the culmination of intercourse. This is the point of the highest bodily enjoyment. When partners lie to each other about orgasm, what they like and what they don't like, they both lose. Feigned orgasm entails a sexual experience that is unsatisfactory for both partners.
When a woman is not satisfied, she usually lies to her man to protect his ego. A man cannot even think that something is wrong and that the woman has not actually experienced an orgasm. Consequently, the conversation about desires and preferences in bed between partners again will not take place. The woman believes that with the help of such lies she protects her man, but as a result she is disappointed. On top of that, she misses the opportunity to enlighten him. As a result, partners find themselves in a vicious circle.
There are several steps a couple can take to achieve mature sexual intercourse.
Talk about it
Find a conversation with the fact that honesty is very important to you and that the pleasure of your partner is also very important to you. Ask the right questions, for example:
- What do you like?
- What is unpleasant for you?
- Maybe some of what I do, you like more? And why?
- Is there something about what you do for me that you don't like?
- Is there something that we haven't tried yet, but would be interested in?
Usually, after such a conversation, a woman feels free from pretense and lies. She will no longer need to imitate, and thanks to this, she will feel more free and relaxed. And he will begin to re-examine his sexuality.
Change your point of view
Get to know each other's bodies, explore and study them like a map. The genitals are not everything. Remember that there is a person in front of you. Caress your neck, back, lower back, exercise in touching. Try to practice the so-called energy touching, touching without contact. Just bring your hand close to your partner's body, but don't touch. Try slow sex, even if you're already slow, slow down even more. Don't try to achieve any result, just enjoy each other's bodies.
Don't forget about feedback
Tell the man that you need more time to "warm up", and don't be afraid that he may get bored during the publicity. Most men, seeing what pleasure their partner is experiencing as a result, are ready to repeat the same long process over and over again.
Often, admitting that you have faked an orgasm becomes a turning point in the relationship between partners. If your man begins to defend himself or goes into rude defense, it may be worth contacting a sex therapist. And if this does not help, perhaps your partner is simply not ready for a mature sexual relationship and you should look for other hugs.
