Sometimes the banal proverb “we don't keep what we have, we cry when we lose” turns out to be a very bitter truth. It seemed to you that you could easily live without it, that it would be better this way, but over time you realize that you are ready to give a lot in order to return it. But you don't have to give anything. What to do? Make no mistakes! You may not be able to return it immediately by following these tips, but, in any case, don't make a fool of yourself and push yourself away forever.
It is necessary
Time and patience
Instructions
Step 1
Leave to return.
Step aside. Let her breathe. It seems to you that if you do not remind yourself, then she will quickly forget you, but this is not so. If your relationship lasted longer than a few days, believe me, she should have remembered the wonderful moments spent with you, but these memories will come only when you stop annoying her “here and now”. No conquest! Don't become a hunter because nobody wants to be prey.
Avoid any contact at all. No SMS, no blog comments, no calls, no conversation with friends about her. If your collision is inevitable - you are studying or working together - be extremely polite, restrained and correct. Do not go beyond friendly formal communication.
Step 2
Understand yourself.
Give your emotions time to cool down a bit and think about why you want to bring it back? Maybe it's only because you are angry with her, because no one has left you before? Or is your pride hurt? Or are you afraid of being alone? Perhaps just a habit? In all these cases, everyone will be better off if your ex stays the same. If you feel that you are losing the only close and dear person, be patient and take your time. You should be fine.
Step 3
Take "private time"
Do not withdraw into yourself, do not wait for news from her, "release" the situation for a while. Meet up with friends, go to the theater, to the cinema, to a good club, on a camping trip or on a visit. Do something positive for yourself. Never get drunk. First, you can lose control of yourself and start calling her, and there is nothing worse than such drunk calls. Second, women only love alcoholics if they are Bruce Willis or Mickey Rourke.
Step 4
Do not be jealous and do not give reasons for jealousy.
Yes, this happens very often - a woman ends a relationship when someone more worthy of attention than you appears on her "horizon". Do you think the same cannot be said about men? Do not interfere with their "candy-bouquet" period, wait for the first impressions to "cool down" and he starts making mistakes. We unwittingly commit all of them when we get used to each other. There are no perfect people. Perhaps this is when your ex will begin to remember you as the perfect partner. If you stage a jealousy scene at this moment, you will lose this advantage.
Do not avoid women, but also do not give reasons for jealousy. Your task is to make it clear that women are interested in you, but you do not easily enter into relationships. Otherwise, either your ex will make an impartial opinion of you as a person who has forgotten her too quickly, which means that she is unworthy and did not appreciate and love her enough. Or he wants to return you. But don't be happy, this will be a "test shot" just to make sure she can do it. After that, the final point will be put in the relationship.
Step 5
Analyze "it".
Find the reason why she left you. Perhaps this is something you know about - alcohol problems? Unreasonable jealousy? Did you spend too little time with her, disappearing at work, with friends, devoting it to your hobby? Are you ready to change it for her? Are you ready to seek professional help in case of addictions? If yes, then do it. If not, then you don't need your girlfriend, but something else.
If you do not understand why she left you, sit down and start remembering everything she said to you in the heat of quarrels, what she complained about. You brushed aside her words before, now it's time to listen to them. List the problems in your relationship and how to solve them. You are now ready to talk.
Step 6
Wait in the wings.
Let her take the first step. Be easily accessible, but don't be overly proactive. As soon as you feel a slight hint of contact, go to the meeting. Now is the time to tell her how sorry you are, to apologize for not listening to her before and hurting her feelings. Say that you are willing to work on yourself for the sake of your relationship. Perhaps she will tell you something that offends you, seems unfair. Try not to get emotional. Remember that you have yet to regain her trust. Don't make excuses or defend yourself. Say that you agree that the "old" relationship is over, but you want to discuss with her how to build the "new" one.
