Put on your jacket, go to sleep, eat: the answer of the little tyrant is always "no" to each of these proposals. But it is possible to cope with the opposition of the child.
This is a tedious oppositional phase of children's development where it seems like the only answer they know is just two letters. Is there a way to get through this period without getting hurt?
Phase "no" in children
You begin to understand how to define this phase of eternal discontent. This is the most important step in the growth of a child as a person. This is the moment when your child realizes that he is more than his mother, that he is on his own. So this stage, even if tedious, is fundamental to defining its identity: you have to face it and manage it, not deny it. The child should not be blamed: he is establishing his own way of life.
There are motives behind these constant whims. A child lives as a researcher in an unknown country: he sees the world with his own eyes, but emotionally and cognitively does not understand it. So he moves by trial and error, exploring the limits and seeing how far he can go. He feels emotions, but does not know what they are, and tries to express them as best he can.
Keep calm
What to do? Experts suggest trying to stay calm as much as possible, and not to raise the tone of voice, if this is not strictly necessary and very firm: good is worth more than a thousand shouts. It is clear that all this is very easy to say, and to do more difficult, but sometimes it takes very little to try to understand and listen to your child: stop, catch your breath and go forward. There is no magic answer that works for all cases.
Consider some examples
To make it easier to understand the topic, you should familiarize yourself with specific examples:
"I don't want to wear my coat before going out!"
In this case, the parent must explain the usefulness of warm clothing and give the child a choice between two different jackets. Never more than two, because otherwise it is confusing: for children, the choice is difficult.
"I do not want to eat!"
The problem of food is a separate world: you can refuse to eat if the baby is not feeling well, has a fever, or has eaten too much before. Refusal may be relevant during the meal itself: you can do the cooking together, ask to set it on the table.
"I don't want to go to sleep!"
To cope with this problem, you must evaluate the moment when the rejection occurs: in September, when does school return to school? On the occasion of the birth of a little brother? The parent should try to understand the reasons why the child does not want to sleep, and express them in their own words, as well as find possible alternatives.
