When a woman gets married, she expects that she and her husband will have a strong, close-knit family. Unfortunately, this is not always the case. Nervousness, discord in the relationship of spouses is brought in by the mother-in-law. Yes, there are mothers who cannot come to terms with the idea that their adored boys are out of parental care and control. Mom tries to control every step of her son, constantly comes with check visits or calls several times a day, demanding a report. Naturally, this is very unnerving for the wife.
Instructions
Step 1
You can understand your dissatisfaction, irritation. Nevertheless, refrain from quarrels, scandals, especially ultimatums: "Either I, or she." Do not forget that it is already very difficult for your husband now, because he was literally between two fires.
Step 2
Do not try to prevent him from seeing his mother, this will only worsen the situation. Almost certainly, in the eyes of your husband, relatives and acquaintances, you will appear angry, insensitive, jealous, selfish (you can be sure that the mother-in-law will not spare time and effort for this).
Step 3
Instead, try to have a serious talk with your spouse. Choose the right moment for this and conduct the conversation in a calm, judicious tone. In no case do not scold your mother-in-law, do not use expressions like: "If you only knew how your mother got me!" The husband then, out of pure principle, will begin to remember how many times his mother-in-law infuriated him. And the conversation will end with a personal transition and a scandal.
Step 4
Instead, immediately clarify: "I understand, she is your mother, she is worried about you, wants everything to be good." And after that move on to the main thing: “But, dear, you are no longer a boy! You are an adult, independent man, the head of the family. We must somehow make it clear to her that you cannot be treated like a helpless baby. " With this approach, the husband will take your words much more calmly. Moreover, he himself probably wondered more than once how to break out of this suffocating maternal care.
Step 5
Consider together how, under any plausible pretext, to reduce the husband's visits to his mother to a reasonable minimum. This is sometimes very difficult, because some mothers-in-law either begin to press on pity (they say, this is the fate of all mothers, raised and no longer needed), or reproach their son for ingratitude, selfishness (I gave birth to you, raised you, and now you spit on your own mother, your wife comes first). However, it is absolutely necessary to do this. You can refer to the great employment of your husband at work, for example. But just not on his poor health: then you will definitely not get rid of your mother-in-law.
