An uninvited guest is worse than a Tatar, and if he still comes with a constant collector of tribute, then at least run away from home altogether. But don't be in a hurry to despair. Fortitude and a little imagination - and you will remain the master of the situation and your own territory.
Necessary
hygiene products, means for repair / cleaning, photo albums, a couple of CDs with music, knowledge of the personal characteristics of the guest
Instructions
Step 1
Find out if your guests are allergic to anything and find out what causes them an allergic reaction. A simple mention from the series "I here promised to keep the neighbor's cat with me while the neighbors are away" is also suitable, if your unwanted guest does not tolerate cat hair.
Step 2
Postpone the time of love pleasures or hygiene procedures to the time when a guest comes to you or should come. Meet it in the appropriate form. Get embarrassed, but not really. After all, it is you on your territory, not him.
Step 3
Bring out all the photo albums you have at home. Joyfully demonstrate them to the visitor (preferably not to repeat yourself) and comment in detail on each frame of the format “I am against the background of a monument to the unknown”, “I am falling with a bomb into the pool” and especially “I am on a pot at 4 years old”. Ignore the protests and the dull look of the guest.
Step 4
Make frequent visits to them yourself and make yourself at home. Do not go too far, but try to bore the owners worse than a bitter radish. Refrigerator raids, washroom occupation, TV and internet siege are good options. It is better not to touch the owner's children and animals - it is possible that the owners will only be grateful to you.
Step 5
Guess cleaning or light repairs by the time the guests arrive, get them to help. A rag with a mop in hand - and go! Who does not work shall not eat. Painting or pest control procedures are also good.
Step 6
During unwanted visits, turn on and off the most annoying music, preferably from among your sincerely loved ones (of course, you will quickly stop loving, but this is a forced victim). The volume depends on the patience of the neighbors.
Step 7
Find out which topic of conversation annoys the guest the most, and return to it with the constancy of gravity. It can be a set of your sores, or what a villain your ex is, or what the country has been brought to. Young mothers are in the most advantageous position: endless stories about someone else's child can drive anyone crazy.
