Sometimes it is difficult to find a common language with grandmothers in raising their own child. How to learn to smooth corners and prioritize correctly in parallel parenting.
There is nothing wrong with a grandmother taking part in raising her own grandchildren. Remember yourself, and how you enjoyed spending time with your grandparents, how much they could teach you, how much care and warmth they gave you.
The difficulty lies in the fact that grandmothers are maximalists by nature, irrefutable canons for whom are the principles of “you need a lot,” “couples of bones do not ache,” “it is harmful to wet your ears when bathing,” “socks and hats are a sacred cause” and much more. Drafts bring them to a swoon, and tempering to madness. Then the once-beloved son-in-law becomes the mortal enemy, and the dear daughter-in-law becomes the armless kulem.
In general, it is possible to prevent a catastrophe. And all the responsibility for this falls largely on the shoulders of the older generation, and not on the children. Dear grandmothers, understand that your experience, in your opinion, is limitless, but still not a written truth. Both good old traditions and prejudices cannot be the main driving force in your goal to help educate. And also remember how many times you unconditionally agreed with your mom, and whether it was so unconditionally and easily. Therefore, to maintain peace and tranquility in the family, try to:
- never make any responsible decisions that concern your grandchildren - this is the prerogative of their parents;
- let youth be responsible for everything they do;
- Responsibly fulfill all "not" - instructions: do not buy, do not wear, do not feed, and so on, until you are asked to do so;
- do not reproach with your help - do it with all your heart and with pleasure in your free time.
And in general, be tolerant of each other and, at least sometimes, try to put yourself in the shoes of your daughter-in-law or daughter and understand her before jumping to conclusions.
