It is important for each child to feel the warmth of a loved one next to him, to share joy with him, to spend time together. Unfortunately, there are children for whom this is a lifelong dream. Abandoned, left orphans, they wait every day for their mother to come for them. These children are ready to entrust their loved one with all their dreams and thoughts. But sometimes it happens that in a foster family, the relationship between the child and the parents does not work out, and the child withdraws into himself, runs away from home, he has his own secrets and secrets. How to win the trust of adopted children in order to become a real close-knit family?
Instructions
Step 1
If your child is three to four years old, first of all, give him time to adapt in your home, in your family. The duration of this period depends on the development of the child, on his age and perception of the world. The kid will have to get used to the new daily routine, to the fact that there is always a mother next to him, that you need to listen to her opinion. Help the child, explain what he can and what is undesirable at this stage, show him the room, toys, locker for things. Give him time to get comfortable in this space and get used to it.
Step 2
Don't ask too much of your child as soon as you take him into the family. Especially if you did not take it as an infant. Each person has his own special features, abilities, so if you sing beautifully and easily draw out operetta arias, there is no need to demand this from the child. Let him choose the activity he likes.
Step 3
Restrain your emotions if the child did something not the way you wanted, not quickly or efficiently. Better in a calm voice explain to him why it was necessary to complete the task, how it could be done faster and better. Help your little one and express hope that in the future he will listen to your words.
Step 4
If you began to notice that at some stage the child began to withdraw into himself, stopped communicating with you, try to analyze this situation, remember the cases that preceded it. Perhaps for several days you quarreled and argued with him, maybe he has problems in kindergarten or school. In a conversation with your child, use soft intonations, tell him how you love him and how important it is for him to smile and be in a good mood. If you kept the secret of adoption, think if the child could accidentally find out about it, choose the softest and kindest words to explain with him.
Step 5
In adolescence, an adopted child experiences the same difficulties as all other children. True, if he knows that he is adopted, this period can be more acute: adopted children begin to feel a sense of being unnecessary to their parents, alienated, lonely, run away into the yards and seek consolation from friends. Be most attentive to the child during this period, and if you have suspicions about his connection with a bad company, the emergence of bad habits, in no case shout at him, do not put forward demands and ultimatums, and even more so do not use force. Try to overcome all difficulties together with your child, talk to him and hear him, and then he may open up in front of you, tell you what worries and worries him, and introduce him to friends.
Step 6
The main thing is to be his friend, support, support, love him the way he is, because for this you took him from the shelter - to love and protect. Be more tolerant of the child's character and habits, desires and requirements, be there during failures and rejoice in success. And then the adopted baby will surely reciprocate with you, will help you in everything, but the most important thing is to trust.
