In a relationship with a mother's son, it is very important to learn how to communicate correctly. By choosing an approach to him, you can create a strong family and limit the influence of his mother.
Instructions
Step 1
First you need to build a trusting relationship with his mom. Try to impress her, appease her with gifts and, if possible, not interfere with her communication with her son. In difficult moments, it is better to remain silent, ignore or yield in an argument in order to maintain peace in the family. But do not try to be at enmity with her or give your husband an ultimatum, because he will always side with your mother.
Step 2
Don't try to compete with his mother. If your husband says “my mom does it differently”, calmly answer “but I do it this way”. No aggression, just stop competing with it. Over time, he will get used to your dishes, habits and will stop comparing you in everything.
Step 3
Watch your words carefully. It is necessary to communicate with mama's son carefully, without hurting his pride and love for his mother. Do not complain about his close connection with his mother, because he does not see it. They do not notice this in their relationship, so your words will be perceived as insults.
Step 4
Raise his self-esteem and develop independence. A common problem with mama's sons is infantilism. They are afraid to make their own decisions, so you need to fuel his confidence. Look to him for advice, help and praise for all his achievements. Make it clear that for you he is a real man, and he wants to become so.
Step 5
Ask for his opinion. Ask about his thoughts, desires, views on the future and everyday questions. Do this in private so that he cannot consult with mom. At such moments, you can find out his true aspirations, and in the future use this knowledge.
Step 6
Never live with his parents. The best option is to leave for another city or country in order to communicate with the mother-in-law only by phone. The spouse will yearn, call every day, but over time may become a normal husband. If there is no way to escape that far, you can choose a living space in another part of the city. A two-hour trip will help keep her from frequent visits.
Step 7
Establish rules in your relationship. Create a set of laws that will not be broken in your family. For example, if you or your children are sick, he should not go to his mother. All important decisions are made by you two, without the intervention of third parties. You don’t have to come up with too many constraints so as not to intimidate him, but cover the main points. So you will be calmer and you will have the opportunity to create a strong, happy family.
